Just Waiting For A Downfall

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I feel very suicidal. I dont understand why. Everything external is right and going smoothly, everything in my head is still jumbled, depressing thought after the next. I dont have the energy to help take care of my mom,let alone do my chores. I just forced myself to shower after 3 days. I missed my meds for last night so I know an episode is on its way. I need to call and get a refill for my lithium.

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