Confusing Love (One Direction Fanfic)

Eleanor The Life Saver

“Let’s talk.” Harry said after a few silent moments. “Oh, right. We need to figure out what exactly we’re going to do. X said that she told Ashley; we need to talk to Ash a.s.a.p.! We also need to talk about our whole… relationship issue.” I stared at Harry until he got uneasy and answered.

“Yeah, I know. I was going to call her after this.” “No, you need to actually see her. So do I.” I hated that Ashley could know and hate me or not know and then hate me even more after hearing the truth. “Harry?” His eyes were scanning the table, but they instantly flashed up to meet mine when I said his name. “Do you love Ashley?”

I noticed his green eyes get watery as he nodded. He looked down and his long lashes brushed against his cheeks. “Why can’t we just be friends? Best friends? We really can’t be anything more. Niall is all I want, and I know you truly care for Ashley. We can fix this together, and everything will be okay again.”

I hoped I convinced him! He smiled briefly, but it faltered as he spoke. “I can’t just get over someone like you. I’ve known you for so much longer than I've known Ashley. I know you more than Niall ever could. I love Ashley and I’d never want to see her hurt, but I can’t stop thinking about you. I really am trying to move on…but I keep wandering back to you. You’re special, Lily. One of a kind, and I’ll never find someone who compares to you.”

That was unbelievably sweet, but I can’t do this! Harry needs to stop and realize that he’s causing a lot of pain to me. And I’m causing pain to others because of this pain. Ugh, why does my life have to be this hard? Why can’t I just be a simple teenager and worry about stress when I’m an adult?! Sometimes I wish I was a little kid again and the only thing I’d be stressing about is not getting the right colored crayon.

The only way for all of this to stop, without harming myself again, would be to let one of them go. “Harry, I think we should stop trying to be just friends.” I sighed as his eyes got excited. I was going to feel so guilty after this. “Really?!” He said in disbelief.

“We shouldn’t be even friends at all. I’m sorry.”

******************

“What did you do?! Harry is going around the house punching walls and stuff!!!” Zayn yelled at me. “You didn’t even hear what he said to me! All this crap about me being the only one for him! He’s making this so hard on me and I can’t deal with it anymore! I know I’ll probably regret this since he’s been my best friend forever and he just got back, but Niall is all I want. You don’t know how hard it is for me to go to sleep knowing that Niall won’t be beside me! I can’t kiss him or tell him about my day! I can’t make him food or ask to hang out! We are barely talking and it’s KILLING me!!! I need him, Zayn. I just need him.”

My voice went from loud at the beginning to very soft at the end. A couple tears trickled down my face and I frustratingly wiped them away with my arm.

“I’m sorry you have to go through this, Lily. I do know how hard it is though, because of…Perrie. I’ll support you, but I hope you know what you’ve gotten yourself into. Harry might go crazy, and you’ll have to go find Ashley. She’s the only one who can calm him. He might not love her as much as he loves you, but Ashley definitely loves him. He needs someone there for him, and it can’t be you. Someday he’ll wake up and realize that he really is in love with Ashley, and he’ll want you back as only a best friend.”

Wow, Zayn was really reasonable and smart! “Thanks!” I said almost too happily considering the situation I’m in. “Um, you’re welcome?” Zayn laughed uneasily as I screamed after hearing the doorbell ring. I ran straight for it and swung open the door to reveal a fashionable Eleanor.