C H A P T E R 59

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59 | What Happens In Paris

 Something very bad happened today, Harri

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... Something very bad happened today, Harri... I- I looked at myself in the m-mirror and...fuck...and I threw up... I'm scared Harri...p-please help me...

All because of me.

Six days had passed since I overheard that conversation when I went to her room at night to apologize. I didn't have it in myself to face her after that. I was now miles away and yet I couldn't find a way to forget her voice screaming that conversation.

She could barely speak. What if she'd have done something to her that night. How was I ever going to forgive myself for that. I may not love her anymore but I had no right to hurt her that way. I yet again gave her the upper hand.

I made her feel disgusted with her own body. I was ashamed of myself. But more than that, I was horrified.

We were going back tomorrow. How was I going to see her and not die a little everytime I did. How long would I run away from my own reflection in the mirror?

"Shut this thing, Rafael." Camila scowled, slamming my laptop shut.

Just what I needed to get more pissed. "What the fuck, Camila! Don't you see I'm working? You know I don't like being disturbed while I'm working."

"Oh really?" She spat, her hands perched on her hips. "Staring at the screen isn't quite called working."

I shut my eyes and massaged my temples. This argument was the last thing I needed right now. "What's with this behavior, Camila?"

"Why? You tolerated Vittoria's every nonsense and I can't even demand you to spend some time with me? It's been six fucking days, Rafael and I'm still seeing that damn Eiffel tower from here." She pointed a stiff manicured finger at the balcony of our hotel room.

Vittoria, Vittoria, Vittoria! She can't just leave her alone. The more I try to forget her, the more she keeps reminding me of her. "Can't you just stop dragging her in every damn thing?"

"But she's present in every damn thing. She isn't here but she's still always between us."

"It's not like that, Camila."

"We're in Paris. You're marrying me. And we still haven't even so much as kissed. You said you'll give it a try but I don't see you trying at all. Tell me Rafael, do you like seeing me like this? Always being used, rejected and insulted?" Her voice broke and so did my heart.

This was the girl who loved me all her life. I kept rejecting her and she kept trying. I should have known that feeling better than anyone. Even I who said I wouldn't give up did that at some point of time but Camila still hadn't.

"I'm sorry." She sighed, lowering herself in my lap. My first instinct was to move away but I resisted the action. I promised her I was going to give us a try and I will.

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