WikiGirl

Chapter 77

From the moment we are born we are destined to be fearful. For bravery ain't travelling alone in anyone's veins. It's always accompanied by its friend. A friend that fuels its existence by simply being there.

Fear its name. A loyal companion to everyone within us. Inseparable for without it we would lose so many more things. We can be courageous and brave for fear within us shine yet we can also be reluctant and miserable because of it too.

What we fear however always varies and from human to human, we sometimes think of someone's else fear as laughable.  Some speak of them no matter how bizarre they may come off and others hide them as weaknesses.

Jimin however never hid the truth any time someone would have asked him what he feared the most. Yet no matter how confidently or seriously he has responded "myself" none so far had understood truly what he meant. None had seen the gravity of that single word and would laugh or even think of him as fearless, showing off that he had only himself to fear and none could harm him.

A man without weaknesses he was proclaimed and as he stood on his couch, rereading that old article of an interview he had once done, he felt suppressed. His fists clenched the paper slightly before he flipped the whole magazine to the side, regretting slightly that he had tried to distract himself by going through that old stuff in his library.

If it wasn't for the late hour of the night and the cold temperature that had taken over the environment, he would have allowed himself to let down his guard and go to sleep. However after he had adjusted the room temperature multiple times to the point that the place should be feeling like summer, he understood well that his coldness was coming from within.

That luring ice, the numbing that was taking over his skin, his fingertips that felt like crystals ready to fall apart. All was because of his mind and that awareness had made him lift up his guard and grow on edge.

He couldn't let himself be overtaken. He couldn't allow them to play him as a puppet. And he wouldn't. This time he was determined.

The white mist that had formed around him, didn't scare him. The ghosty hands that he kept feeling against the back of his head and kept ignoring. No, they didn't scare him.

But... that was nothing but a lie.

Under his stoic face in the deem light of the single lamp he had on, his heart was beating fast and his breaths were flickering like the flame of a candle stunning by an open window. He stood still in the middle of the darkness in his head, sensing the snowstorm that could come for him.

His foot started moving rapidly in place making him place his palm over his knee in an attempt to halt the movement that portrayed his edgy state of mind however his foot did not halt, bringing him to jolt from his seat in hurry.

The breath that escaped his lips echoed in the silence heavily right before he left his hands to travel his face in weariness.

"It's gonna be okay. The morning will arrive soon... I need to get my thoughts to settle" He murmured to himself knowing that he had brought this upon himself for he had left himself fall emotionally and he had left the occurrences around him take a toll on him that in no way he could afford.

For he had enemies watching over him with every breath he takes. Unlike other people he had his fear, luring in the shadows to steal any moment of weakness he could display and turn it into an opportunity to live.

How much easier would it have been if he was afraid of heights. Of insects, of other humans. But he was afraid of monsters and they all were in him.

Jimin's steps echoed faintly as he walked towards the bathroom, in need of some water that could possibly help him get a better grip on his slipping state. Once he opened the door and rushed to the sink, no hesitation took place as he splashed and splashed his face with water.