Codependent

Chapter 105

It was 6 am when I stepped into the gym, consuming 2 hours of thinking, with seeing how much I could take physically. Luckily I wasn't disappointed.

I was taken out of it when Loki started yelling at me making me sigh, but I stopped anyway. He gave me a speech about how I should spare my energy for tonight. I knew he was right, but anything was better than thinking at the moment.

He dragged me along to breakfast where a few others were doing the same saying good morning. I'd thought they would be more distant, but everyone was cheerful, asking me if I needed anything. I was looking around confused asking myself which one was worse.

Loki made me breakfast ignoring everyone else while I looked at him silently. The second I stopped moving, my thoughts took over leaving no space for anything else. The conversation I had with Andrew stuck with me and it left me unable to have a good night's sleep. I was wondering if Tony ever came up with a design for a backup plan not even knowing if he got any sleep. Knowing him, that would probably be a no. 

I ate the pancakes in small bites feeling Loki's eyes on me and my plate but my stomach was filled with thoughts already. Yet I knew I needed food so I ate them all thanking Loki in my mind he didn't make extra this time.

"You got a lot on your mind?" Loki asked softly already knowing the answer. "I have everything on my mind," I answered softly not looking away from my plate. Loki sighed softly and he straightened his back.

"You haven't told me who you called yesterday yet," he said sounding concerned. I didn't notice I haven't spoken to him about everything and now he was filling things in for himself, that only could've gone wrong...

"I was talking to Andrew, I just needed some help organising my thoughts," I said and he relaxed more when I said it while looking into his eyes.

"We might have a way for me to be able to fight him, but you're not going to like it," I said and Loki frowned. "I want to know if Tony has a backup plan before I'm telling you," I said dryly but his frown didn't leave.

"Is it that bad?" he asked and I didn't respond giving him his answer. Suddenly he was in a hurry to go to Tony making me nervous but I was praying he got something. When we walked in he was asleep on the workbench making me sigh. We opened the door and he shot up looking confused with the lines of his shirt on his face making me smile. He sighed waking himself up and then gesturing for us to come to him.

"Did you sleep here?" I asked him concerned and he just looked at me blankly telling me yes, but he was too ashamed to say it.

"I have... an idea..." he said carefully and unsure making me nervous again. "And..." I said wanting him to spill it.

"Well, I still have to make it, and it's a backup, backup plan, it is dangerous," he said looking between Loki and me. "How dangerous?" Loki asked softly.

"It could cause severe nerve brain damage, there's nothing like this, nothing to go from, it's just an idea," he explained and showed us the idea. It was a chip with little spider-legs-looking things on the sides that were meant to penetrate the skin on the back of my neck sending impulses or something.

"So... I'm doomed..." I said softly letting my thoughts slip out of my mouth. Tony and Loki looked at me concerned feeling bad for me and I hated it, but they were right, this situation wasn't looking good. I hated how out of control I was.

"Maybe it's meant to be this way, maybe..." I said sighing stopping to take a breath looking at both of them. "Maybe I'm meant to lose..." I finished and their eyes widened and the concern grew stronger.

"You can't give up now, you won't and you can't!" Tony said more irritated than I expected but he hated to be out of control in this situation as much as I did and I knew it frustrated him. I felt it.