Drop Dead | Sam Fender

Chapter Fifty Nine

Sam

I hadn't told my mother about wanting to drop out of school the day after Rory and I's conversation. Nor the day after that. In fact, it had been well over two weeks since that day and my mam was none the wiser about my feelings. I knew Rory was getting frustrated with me, not that she ever let it out on me but it was because she wanted the best for me. She had tried to persuade me into telling my mam a few times by pointing out the fact I would be able to drop out sooner, to which, I told her I could just drop out and tell her afterwards, but apparently, she liked having a living boyfriend.

"Mam, can I talk to ya for a minute?" I asked nervously as I leaned against the doorframe of the living room, peering over at my mother, who was curled up on the sofa.

"Course," she smiled, nodding her head towards the sofa opposite for me to sit on, which I did. "What is it?"

"Uhh," I stumbled as I fiddled with my hands in my lap.

"You're making me nervous, Sam," she commented, staring at me intently.

"I'm dropping oot of school," I blurted. My eyes widened when I realised the words that had left my mouth. The plan was to not drop it on her like a bomb, but I couldn't stop my tongue.

"Excuse me?" she gaped.

"I'm planning on... dropping oot of school," I repeated, this time much more quietly as I gauged her reaction.

"Why?" she asked with a frown.

I shrugged. "I'm basically failing-"

"I know, I've had Mr Goddard on the phone more than a few times," she muttered.

"-I don't see the point in staying and doing my exams," I finished, bowing my head in shame. "If I'm gan fail them, why bother?"

"But what if ya don't?" she inquired.

"Mam, I barely passed me GCSEs. I just don't see how it's possible for me to pass my A levels," I told her truthfully. "Least without school I can work more."

"This is a big decision to make, Sam," she sighed.

"I know. It's not one I've made lightly, I've been thinking 'bout it for a while now," I informed her.

"And you're sure about this?" she asked. I nodded, looking up at her through my eyelashes. She paused in thought for several moments, pondering over the information I had laid out before her before letting out a loud sigh. "Alreet. I'll phone Mr Goddard in the morning."

"Thanks, mam!" I grinned, bundling over to her and pulling her into a hug.

"Aye, aye," she mumbled, batting me away from her playfully.

"Are you sure about this, Sam?" Mr Goddard asked me with a grave look on his face.

"Never been so sure of sommat in all me life," I told him.

"Is there nothing I can do to change your mind?" he frowned.

"Nah," I replied, shaking my head to emphasise my point.

"Right," he sighed, staring down at the paperwork on his desk. "There's a few forms I need you to fill out for me. It'll only take a few minutes."

I took the paper and a pen that he passed to me, quickly reading through the information and filling out the blank spaces such as my name and date of birth. I felt Mr Goddard's heavy gaze on me as I filled the paperwork out, which I tried to ignore. I did feel bad, the man had been looking out for my well-being since I had started here and was likely the reason I hadn't been kicked out already. But there was no point in delaying the inevitable. Signing my name at the bottom along with today's date, I slid the pile of papers back to him.

"Is that everything?" I inquired, eager to get out of there.

"Yeah, that's everything," he smiled, standing up from his chair as I did. "It's a shame to see you go, Sam. You've got a lot of potential."

"Ya don't have to lie to us, sir," I snorted as I shoved my hands into my pockets.

"I'm not lying. You've got a bright future ahead of you," he told me, holding out his hand, which I stared at for a moment before shaking.

"Whatever helps ya sleep at night I guess," I spoke sarcastically.

"Good luck, kid," he mumbled under his breath as I vacated his office but I didn't spare him a second glance. I barely paid my surroundings any notice, not feeling nostalgic at all as I passed through the hallways for what would probably be the last time.

"Sam?" Joe's voice pulled me from my thoughts, Rory and Harlow standing at his side. "Where the fuck've ya been all day?"

I greeted my girlfriend with a quick kiss and snaked an arm around her waist before turning my attention back to my friend. "Coming in kinda defeats the point of dropping oot." I shrugged nonchalantly.

"You're dropping oot?" Harlow gaped in disbelief, her eyes flickering over to her best friend to gauge her reaction.

"I already have," I told her.

"Fuckin' hell, mate. I didn't think ya were actually being serious," Joe murmured.

"Aye, no point staying in the shithole was there?" I snorted.

"You're lying. They've kicked ya oot, haven't they? You're just too embarrassed to admit it," Harlow accused.

"Deadly serious," I confirmed with a roll of my eyes. Immediately her head turned towards Rory next to me, not believing a word that came out of my mouth.

"He's telling the truth, Harls," she laughed as she subconsciously leaned into my side, my hand resting over her hipbone.

"Well, I never," she mumbled in shock.

"Are ya done for the day now?" I asked Rory as I turned my attention to her solely.

"Yeah, was just about to head home," she smiled.

"You're not ditching us for this loser?" Harlow scoffed, folding her arms across her chest as she stared me down. I had to give it to her, even a whole ten inches shorter than me, she still scared the shit out of me sometimes. How Dean dealt with her I had no idea.

"Harls, yous have both got another lesson in ten minutes," Rory giggled. "Ya know I'd pick ya any day."

"Oi!" I grumbled.

"Too reet," Harlow gleamed, revelling in the pout that adorned my facial expression. "C'mon Joey, we've got places to be apparently."

"See yous in a bit," my girlfriend told them, waving her goodbyes before turning to me. "Ready?"

"You and I are gan have a strong word when we get home, missy," I scowled, poking her side teasingly.

"Oh, shut up," she laughed, pulling away from me and tugging my hand in the direction of the exit.