To Heal is to Feel

Rose blood

    It's too dark to think. The groans and hisses of the dead not far behind me. It's been two days. I know that because when the sun came up then went down I knew that the day was beginning and ending. 

I saw a familiar building up ahead and broke from the woods into a small clearing. The moonlight was enough so I could see that it was the building me and Daryl found while on search for Sophia. Sophia... I promised that I'll go back to her and I never will. Never will.

Daryl. The group. All of them.

I'm never going to see them again.

I feel the familiar sting in my eyes then as it travels down to my nose. I'm alone. Just like when mama disappeared, I was alone. 

The faint sounds of the walkers not too far from here made me look towards the house ones more before running to it. It was empty when we searched it, granted there was close to nothing in it. It would keep me away from them till morning. It has to. I open the door before quitely shutting the door and looking around for something to put against it.

I find a wooden chair and go to grab it but stop when I feel a walker snarling right out front. I can't move and risk making any noise. It's right there that I could hear it take in raspy gasps. Like it was a living thing. It sort of was.

My knees start to shake and I fall to the ground. I make sure to call on my hands first but regret it when I feel a sharp heating pain on the palms of my hands to my wrist. Ow. I bit my lip to not make a sound but that doesn't stop the growing river flowing down my face. 

I want to be with the group. 

All night was me with my back against the door that wouldn't stop banging. My eyes felt heaviest they have ever felt but I couldn't go to sleep. I couldn't. 

By morning my back felt like it's been carrying a horse on it for years. I arch my back and feel it crack a bit. I let my knees hit the ground as they crack and I spread my arms around me to hear them crack again. The only thing not cracking is my head, unfortunately.

The banging on the other side of the door is no longer there and instead a quiet tension has took over. The sound of the birds reminds me that it is morning and I'm alive.

I'm alive.

I use the wobbly door handle to bring myself to my full height.  I look around and all I could think about is when me and Daryl were here. I walk around before I find the stairs. I use the handle on the side to walk up them. We didn't search the top, stupid not too now that I think of it. 

On the top of the stairs there is a door in front of it and a hallway that leads to an open room.  I decide to check out the open room first. I lean against the wall until I'm walking into the upstairs living room. There was nothing here. It was all blank. There was nothing I could use.

"Damn it." I grunt out before I feel my knees give out and I fall face first onto the floor. I let out a loud yelp before I quickly bring my hand up to my mouth. I feel a warm liquid and am not sure if it is drool or blood. I'm on my knees then feet before I know it and walking towards the room with the door.

There has to be something in here.

I go to open it but It doesn't want to give. It's fucking locked? Are you serious? A growl of frustration leaves me as I look around the hall and stairs to see if I could use anything to open it with. I see a crowbar in the corner of the hallway. Thank you.