To heal is to feel

The fault

They didn't let me help with moving the cars, so I went into the rv and grabbed my bag to put todays finding in it

I tried not to look at carols testified face the words 'your fault' kept singing loudly in my head, but maybe I can make things better

I would find Sophia, I would bring her back to Carol and apologies. I know mom would be grateful if someone brought me back after losing me, I think...

I leave my bag in the rv with my things in it, walking around the rv to the front and leaned against it, watching the 'mature' adults move the cars

I watch from behind Dale as he makes hand signals to Andrea, telling her which direction to stir the wheel of a car

I bow my head and stare at the skin of my arms as Carol walks up to Dale

"Why aren't we all out there looking? Why are we moving cars?" She ask, her voice soft as usual but there's something broken to it

"We have to clear enough room so I can get the rv running. Now that we have fuel we can double back to a bypass that Glenn flagged on the map." Dale explains

We're not leaving until We find Sophia

"Going back going to be easier than trying to get through this mess." Shane makes his usual annoying comment of the day but I just seem to ignore him more than usual because of it

"We're not going anywhere until my daughter gets back." Carol says , almost in a panic until Lori places her hand gently on carols shoulders

"Hey that goes without saying." She comforts the mother

I don't stand and listen to them comfort carol long before I push off of the rv soundlessly and make my way into the crowd of cars.

I stop at one of the cars windows, walking up to my reflection in the window. Wow, I'm so... dirty. I wonder if the group finds it hard to look at me with this much dirt on my face.

I let out a sigh before my eyes slowly find the ground and my feet start to walk back in the direction of the rv

If they won't let me help with the cars then a nap would be nice.

"Hey," I hear Shane's voice say lowly, I stop and bring my head up to him.

"What are you doing?" I ask, confusion evident in my face. He was bent over the front of a car and seemed to be working on it , but why? He was riding in the rv before

We don't need another car

"I-I am..." he looks between the car and me but he looks at me like he was shocked at my question. Why? "Why are you looking so down, hmm?" He ask

His eyes bore into mine so intense with worry but I don't know if it's real or not so I just shake my head

"I'm not... down." I mutter , looking at the tool in his hand before back up at his eyes that were still watching me like I was a bomb

"What's that?" I say, bringing my arm up and point at the thing in his hand. He furrows his eyebrows before looking down at the weird looking thing in his hand and then at me in realization

"Come here, Ill teach ya' " he says waving me over, I walk off the road and onto the grass before making it over to him, I lean against the car as i bring my head up to look up at him with nothing but seriousness and curiosity about the thing in his hand

"This," he grabs my hand and puts the weird object in my palm, " is a wrench and this is a screw driver." He explains and leads my hands to do what his hands were doing before