.Stone And Lumber (Johanna Mason X F.OC).

-''I am not the mockingjay''-

(Fun fact: I've been planning the Avox trick since I mentioned having a really bad idea and not knowing if I'd go through with it and I did.)

"So... Anything can be done here?" Prim asked since she still was in training, Athena was much more gentle with her then Peeta's outburst, just like how Plutarch predicted and for now she was the only human contact allowed.... Well until this morning she was.

"The damage is so great and the help was so little." The female doctor said, Athena turning to hostility when the male doctor had entered so they quickly switched him out.

Both the victor and the young girl hoped that there was something to be done with her hands, she didn't feel them at all, her right hand having a finger or two move as if they were on ratchets, unable to splay them wide, her left one had constant tremors, easily getting into cramps that locked up her hand and only then did she feel anything and it was pain, some movements she couldn't do and there was an outright reduction of maneuverability. "They will never be what they were before."

Athena dropped her hands when the doc did too, resting them in her lap, ignoring the shoulder squeeze from the younger girl.

She stared at them, looking at just how much she lost, she was just what the Capitol wanted, she was just her body.

"Is everything alright?" Was asked of her.

Athena smiled.

And she smiled, she smiled to not bother the doctor, to not make Prim feel bad, she smiled to protect them from her.

She gave a nod, moving to bite her tongue to keep silent but there was nothing to bite on.

(If Athena was a pane of glass, only dust would be left but trust that that dust is sharp as fuck.)

There was a hick but she stayed smiling, nodding their worries away.

The bottle of emotions had once cracked and exploded but she'll be damned if she doesn't collect the pieces and glue them together.

The rest of the daily check up went as smoothly as they could, Athena not complaining through the pain.

It felt like the first time she took a breath was when they finally left, leaving her alone in the little room.

The walls instantly felt like they were closing in as her gaze burned through the thin hospital blanket, her legs and the hospital bed all the way through the floor and the earth.

She put her hands of her face, even that, unable to fully grab it how she wanted.

They had won, they had took everything from her, making her nothing but a body to use, nothing but a tool.

She was nothing more then a useless tool.

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The two victors and Prim waited for the doctor to leave before anyone spoke up about something Johanna had mentioned before the doc arrived for the daily checkup.

"I still don't get why I can't go in there." Johanna felt angry, watching Athena cry into her hands now that she was left alone in the room too her knowledge.

It broke her heart and if nothing was to change she would, she just can't bear it.

"Peeta almost killed Katniss and Athena almost killed you, we need to be careful and be sure she is stable enough for another meeting between you two, it is too dangerous, Prim is making an excellent stand in." She hated how Heymitch was siding with Plutarch.

"Or seeing me could help her."

"Johanna, how many times has she lashed out for less? Are you out of your mind?"

"They call me the mad wolf, there needs to be some truth to it."

"Johanna!"

"No Heymitch, maybe you, all of you, are cowards but I am not."

"How many has she hurt you already? Don't think we hadn't seen those hand marks, she almost put an end to your run."

"It wouldn't have mattered, take a page from my book, if you want something do it because you will lose your damned chance for it."

Because she didn't insist, because she let it go so easily, she'd never hear Athena ever say that she was her friend, her little wolf, that she liked her, loved her, teasing her, reassuring her, she'd never hear anything of those because in the arena she didn't insist and accepted a 'When we see each other' thinking she'd have so many more years and yet Athena was here but the chance was gone... She is not making the same mistake again.

"Don't tell me what you'd do you drunkard, I am myself and if I want to be minced meat then let me be, I am not the mockingjay, I am not Finnick sweetheart Odair, I am not the oldest living victor Mags, I am not the motherfucking Reaper, I am the mad wolf, Johanna fucking Mason, when was the last time I did not do what I want?! And what I want is to be let in that damned room to be ripped too shreds if such is my future!!"

"I'd say let her." Prim said making all look at her. "What? We all can see into the room, we can all see if it would go haywire and as long as Johanna doesn't nudge the mutt I don't think she'd be hurt."

"Even she vouches for me."

Heymitch sighed, hating being sober.

"If Plutarch or Coin learn you died because I let you inside against orders this will all be over."

"Then close your eyes and lie because I am going in there, you want it or not, I have had enough of this and will no longer stand and watch through a window when I should be in there, with her."

"You kids are always so hotheaded." From the old mentors only he, Mags and Wiress were left, knowing the fate of most other victors, either they somehow escaped the search for them, but maybe one or two did, or the were rescued... Or their untimely death but escape from the pain. "Wait here, let me get Finnick, he is strong and also from a career district, he'll hold her back off if something goes array... Plus he wouldn't rat us out."

"Well go get him."

Heymitch marched off groaning about the lack of alcohol.

(Another fun fact: despite it all, Athena got a violent and torture filled smoking rehab, can't really keep it up in the games, then the Capitol and now in 13, she won't die to lung cancer or something wow..... Now she just need the rest of her life to follow and take example on how to improve itself.)

Johanna watched him go before turning back to the window, Athena still fully crying behind it making her frown heavily.

"You are not waiting for them are you?" Prim asked.

"Fuck no I am not." Johanna walked passed her, the trainee medic didn't stop her.

"Good luck." Prim said, walking away since through mics in the wall they could hear what was going in the room and wanting to leave them a bit of privacy.

Johanna gave a little nod, turning too the door and taking a breather before turning the knob of it.