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Elsa

Mikka was already at the clinic, waiting for us when we arrived. The closer we got to the examination room, the more anxious I got. I was dreading it more than ever. To get that confirmation that it was another miscarriage.

That another life was lost in me.

I felt suffocated.

Nicholas , Antonio, and Giovanni were just as worried. No one bothered to mask their emotions as they were concerned for my well-being and what was going to happen.

“So, what are we dealing with?” Mikka asked once she closed the door to give us some privacy while Antonio and Giovanni waited outside.

“I took a pregnancy test, it was positive but… I’m bleeding and cramping.” I swallowed hard as Mikka listened carefully to me. Nicholas  stayed close to me, holding me as if I would collapse at any moment. What I loved about Mikka was that even though she knew us, she was still being professional and not letting us see if she was concerned as she listened to me.

“Okay, we will do a blood test and do a transvaginal ultrasound for a more detailed view. Are you going to slap my hands if I come near you with a needle?” Mikka smiled and her teasing slightly lessened the tension in my body.

“I will try not to.” I returned her smile.

I looked away, focusing on Nicholas while she drew my blood. It wasn’t too bad this time. Or maybe because my mind was going crazy, and having me feeling more dreadful than ever.

I don’t want to go through this again…

“Please undress from the waist down and place your legs here.” Mikka instructed once she came back. My heart was beating faster and faster when I got on the hospital bed, bending my knees as she covered me to do the examination.

Nicholas  was next to me, holding my hand and caressing my head for comfort.

“Whatever happens, we’ll get through it, okay?” He whispered softly to me. Words were stuck in my throat. I was unable to say anything and gave a nod instead. I held his hand tightly, feeling like hours were passing by and I was trying my best not to let out a sob.

“Oh…” Mikka suddenly said, having us immediately look at her. Her brows were slightly furrowed as she focused on the screen and I braced myself for her to confirm I was miscarrying.

“What is it, Mikka?” Nicholas  asked impatiently, and just as anxious as I was.

“Well – Actually, you should see for yourselves.” She turned the screen around to us. I let out a shocked gasp when she explained what we were seeing.

“So, everything is fine? But what about the bleeding and cramping

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“So, everything is fine? But what about the bleeding and cramping.” I stumbled on my words, afraid to get my hopes up in case it was a false alarm.

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