Ch.84 - Be Angry

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Yo, so I'm in Seattle?? Pretty cool here if I may say so myself. Very artsy. Being in the city in which this story takes place, idk, it gives me a lot of late ideas haha. Plus, you know IMMA GO SEE Meredith Greys HOUSE tomorrow. HAR HAR HAR. Im so stoked! I'm looking out for Mcdreamy too, sooo shoutout to Der and CharBert because my brain works like that haha.

I fucked up a little and forgot to mention that this chapter and the last one used to to be just an 8K long chap now split in two. There is still one more chap plus an epilogue! I'm sorry for the confusion.

ONE MORE CHAPTER TILL THE EPILOGUE.
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Bit breathless by the roller coaster ride of her soliloquy that is now suddenly not a soliloquy, she finally casts a look at him; ruggedly left in this bitter expanding silence where he mutters out beginnings but never finds the purchase to continue speaking.

"Please say something, Robert." She breathes it out with her heart giving life to her words. "Stop being the good guy, and get angry with how I treated you, come on." All bloody and pleading and true. So fucking true. She sucks in air and he is rigidly still with black beady eyes with pupils that have blown to full attention. All that built up demeanour--alike an armour, it's blown down flat.

"I--" His facial features are twisting and forming with all the flying thoughts ripping through him. "You broke it off, Charlie," and for a moment, fleeting and grading, he looks like a young boy no longer trapped within the walled boundaries that cemented him in. Stuttering and soft and so so quiet, "W-What am I supposed say to that?"

"Just, just be how you're feeling." He looks so struck and stuck like a buck just barely standing, uncertain and disorientated--and Charlotte feels absolutely the fucking same. "I just, I don't know what, what, but I-I see Moll in this house, even though she's only been here a few times, I still see her. It's horrible. But it's you I see here, too. In this house. Don't you have something to say about that?"

"Something to say about you ending it right out there, in that room, on that bed?" He points, "I came to terms with it."

"I don't want you to come to terms with it, Robert--"

"Stop, please. Stop saying my name like, like... You have no idea, okay?" Heat radiating from her cheeks and ears, drowning in her twisted shame (she deserves it). "I can't think when you, when--fuck. Why would you say all that?"

"Because I wanted us to start over. Because I want us to be truthful and for you to stop being all perfect and everything--to just be human and get upset with me." She's spilling and vomiting words without grace or ease. Tumbling to ruin all inhabitants that manage to grasp the rushed concept she hurriedly tries to convey. "Make me feel like the bad guy I am and be honest with me like I'm trying to be with you."

He pulses forward with a surge of broken words that tear at his tongue and draw him in distress as he says with open palms, "I don't want to when you've just buried your sister."

Her jaw suddenly feels wired shut as he is there, breathing out fuming remorse. The red of his eyes standing out against the speckled colours that convey nothing but an emotion cousin to frustration and filtered in with his own mourning.

Though it's a second too late as the weighted steps of friends pile in with one trying to convince the other not to. "--Jay don't!" CJ stumbles after a stern eyed Jay, concerned and full of opinions as they all but barge into the conversation at the foot of the bathroom door.

He jabs a finger at Robert with power behind his words and an unhinged tone to his voice. "I think it's time for you to leave."

Some flaring annoyance lights like dry birch inside Charlotte, as she says, "Leave us be, Jay. Everything's fine, we're just talking."

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