Sawamura Daichi || Always

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HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO MY INTERNET MOM geekiemire! Thank you for being my internet mom (even though I'm older and totally used to being the friend mom) -- have this story I wrote about your husbando; I hope you like iittttt ^.^

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 When Daichi thought back on his seventeen years of life there only seemed to be three things that were constant; 1.) volleyball, which he started playing after his fifth birthday when his father gave him a ball, 2.) Sunday dinners with his parents and older brother, which he would almost always help prepare, and 3.) (l/n) (f/n).

Daichi met (f/n) - well, he can't really remember the exact day because he was that young, but since that day he knew that anytime he walked out his front door (f/n) would be there, waiting to walk to school with him or throw the volleyball up for him so he could spike it or even just sit and talk and hang out with him.

And if he had to choose, Daichi would say that (f/n) was his favorite constant in his life. Yeah, he loved Sunday dinners with his family, loved cooking with his mom, and he really, really loved volleyball and the team it's brought him to leading and the people he met through such an amazing sport, but (f/n) was - well, she was (f/n).

(f/n) was smart and strong and sassy and something that Daichi had always had, someone that Daichi could always go to, no matter how big or small the problem he was facing. He really couldn't picture his life without her - ever since they were children (f/n) was everywhere he turned, everywhere he looked. They walked to school together in the mornings, went to class together during the day, and after Daichi was done at practice and (f/n) was done with her own after school activities they were studying and eating dinner with each other's families- they were always together.

So, it was no surprise when Daichi found himself liking (f/n) more than he should. He didn't think it was a big deal - he figured that maybe, maybe (f/n) would like him back, maybe (f/n) would feel the same, would feel like there was nobody in the world that could support her like Daichi, because that's how Daichi felt about her.

But he was wrong - start of their third year of high school (f/n) was rambling on about some boy that Daichi could never be, some boy that Daichi could never compare to, and he had to be supportive despite his disappointment.

*****

He tried to see her less. 

It didn't work, obviously - they were still neighbors, still best friends, but (f/n) was spending time with this new boy, and when she wasn't she was a flustered mess, talking to Daichi about how amazing this boy was. Daichi tried his hardest to be supportive, but it was hard for him. The guy that (f/n) liked wasn't known to ever settle down, was just one to fuck around with girls before leaving them alone - Daichi had called him a fuckboy on many occasions to Suga and Asahi when ranting about his situation, and he didn't care how rude that made him sound - this guy was a fuckboy.

He wanted to tell (f/n), wanted to warn her, but he was too annoyed at everything - himself for not building up the courage to confess, and (f/n) for finding someone new, someone she had yet to learn everything about and latching on to them. Daichi thought he was good enough - he should have known that he wasn't going to be.

They weren't exactly in the midst of a fight, but Daichi had made it obvious he wasn't in the mood to be with (f/n) the last few days, and in return she'd stopped bothering him with text messages and calls. She had been asking for advice about the date she had with her crush that Friday, but she seemed to get the hint that Daichi didn't want to help and she gave up.

He almost didn't answer the phone that night - it was rather late, almost 11:30, but he didn't have school the next morning so he was reading some book, hoping to pass the time quickly until he was tired enough to stop thinking about (f/n) out on a date with what's his name. He didn't want to hear her talk about the date, didn't care about how it had gone, but there was a part of him that was worried, because (f/n) knew he didn't want to hear about it and she wasn't one to gloat - she would only be calling if she needed something.

"Hello?" he said into the phone after finally deciding to answer it.

"Come outside?" (f/n) said, and Daichi didn't hear any signs of overwhelming happiness in her voice, so he agreed and made his way to the front of his house.

(f/n) was sitting on the curb in front of his home, wearing a pair of sweatpants and an old t-shirt (one Daichi was sure he had given to her). He sat beside her and they were quiet for a few minutes, both unsure of what to say.

Daichi decided to be the braver person and spoke first. "Date go good?"

"No," (f/n) replied immediately, her eyes on the street in front of them. She was flipping her phone around in her hands, obviously nervous. Her voice was quiet when she spoke next. "He doesn't really like me."

Daichi's heart broke a bit at the sound of her voice cracking, but he didn't make a move to comfort her, hands staying clasped in front of his body. "He's a fuckboy," Daichi said, and (f/n) nodded her agreement.

They were quiet for a little while again, neither knowing how to carry on the conversation. It was awkward - (f/n) never had trouble keeping conversations going with Daichi, always spewing out nonsense without a care, because she didn't have to worry about being judged with Daichi- her silence was more than unsettling. "I feel stupid," (f/n) finally said, welcoming Daichi to agree.

She was surprised when he replied with a steady, "you shouldn't." because Daichi was always one to tell the truth, even if it was a little harsh. "He's good at making girls think his intentions are pure."

(f/n) hummed an agreement. "I'm still stupid - I should have known by how you were acting that he wasn't good. You usually don't hesitate in telling me the truth, what stopped you now?"

'I didn't want you to know that I'm desperate and stupidly in love with you.' Daichi thought, and he almost let himself say it.

He didn't, though, and instead settled for, "You were happy."

(f/n) laughed and bumped her shoulder with Daichi's. "I was happy before he came around and tried to make me swoon. I've got you, Daichi, and until someone realizes how great you are I can't leave you alone - you're hopelessly blind to the way people feel about you."

'So are you.' Daichi thought, but again he settled for something else. "You don't need me holding you back from the things you want, (f/n)."

They met eyes and Daichi was surprised to see tears in (f/n)'s. "You know what's best for me, though. You knew that he didn't like me, that he was just using me, but you didn't tell me because you wanted me to be happy. In an odd way that's a very nice thing to do."

(f/n) moved until she was sitting close enough to Daichi to feel his body heat, and she wrapped her arms around his waist as well as she could in the position they were in, her face being buried in his side.

"I don't know what I did to deserve a best friend like you, Daichi - you're an angel."

Daichi smiled sadly, wishing that (f/n) could see that he thought the same exact thing about her. "Well, I'm not going anywhere, and that's a promise."

It was probably a bad promise to make - Daichi was going to stew in these feelings forever, probably, and then was going to be utterly torn apart when (f/n) found somebody else to officially settle down with.

Maybe one day though he'd finally build up the courage to tell her how he felt, and maybe one day he would be able to hold (f/n) anytime he wanted and kiss her without worrying, but for now this was enough - being there to comfort (f/n), best friend or something more, would always be enough.


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