Good & Broken

Full Circle

LA, USA
June 13th, 2020
Miley's POV

Liam and I were officially divorced now. He's having some of his friends move his stuff into his new house. I got the house, and most of the stuff. He said it didn't matter to him, and he'd just buy new stuff. He said he's doing better, he isn't as hurt. But he said he'll have to be in Australia longer since they can't film when he has a broken arm. Honestly, I'm thankful we're finally divorced. All it was doing was stressing me the fuck out. I decided to keep the babies. I know it's crazy, but I feel like it shouldn't abort them. Not after having Jessica. I know I wanted it before, but that's because I was scared. I'm not so scared anymore. Liam told me Jennifer is going to the doctor today to see if she's really for sure pregnant. I'm hoping she isn't. I don't wanna explain to Jessica that her father fucked up and got another girl pregnant. How the hell am I supposed to explain that to a two year old? I started recording my new album again. I'm not going to release it until after the twins are born, and I won't go on tour until maybe they're eight months to a year old. I don't wanna tour when they're so small. I finally started to show, but I have just a tiny baby bump. It looks like I'm really early in my pregnancy, even though I'm fifteen almost sixteen weeks pregnant. I'm worried that they're too small, but I have to wait until my doctor appointment which is on June 17th. No one knows yet about my pregnancy except my family, Chris, and Katie. Katie hasn't even told Luke, which I'm happy for. I'm planning on telling everyone else I know after my appointment, that way I can tell them how the babies are doing. And so I know if they're okay. Then I'll tell basically the whole world I'm pregnant when I'm damn good and ready. And I don't wanna find out the genders, I just wanna do a unisex nursery. It'll be easier in my opinion. That way if I have a boy and girl, I won't have to worry about getting two different colors of everything. I'll have to pick out more names though, four girl names and four boy names. In case I have two girls, or two boys. Right now I was at home with Jessica. She was playing with her toys while I sat on the couch and watched her.

"Mommy?" Jessica asks me.

"Hmm?"

"I miss daddy."

"I know Jessica, I miss daddy too." I say.

"Then why he move out?"

"Like he said, we fight. It isn't good for you to be around all of the fighting. It's better this way. And you still get to see him on weekends."

"Do you hate daddy?" She asks. Then I tear up.

"No Jessy. I don't."

"Do you love him?" What do I say now? I do love him, but I can't tell her that.

"Um, it's complicated Jessica. You wouldn't really understand." I say. I was being honest, it is complicated and she really wouldn't understand.

"Okay mommy." Then I frown.

"Are you hungry?" I ask, then she shakes her head.

"No."

"Okay, let me know when you are."

"I will mommy." She says. Her little Australia accent kills me. It reminds me of Liam. I know it sounds horrible, but I don't want the twins to inherit their father's accent. It'll just remind me of Liam even more.

"Good." Then she goes back to playing. I watch her for about five minutes, then my phone rings, it was Liam. "What?" I answer.

"Hi."

"Liam, I don't even wanna talk to you-"

"Jennifer got back from her doctor appointment." He says, interrupting me.