XXIV

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It's been more than a week since that argument I had with Zayn and I regret every second of it

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It's been more than a week since that argument I had with Zayn and I regret every second of it. I admit I'm stupid but stupidness couldn't explain it. Everything was going fine and just in a blink of an eye I fucked everything up.
     He barely glances at me twice. He's all cold and distant again and the look on his face scares me from trying to talk to him.
     After that night, the next morning I was gone. I honestly had no intention of going back and I knew for sure he wouldn't come after me but somehow, I found myself going back on Saturday. I had hoped we could talk it out but not once did I have an alone time with him. Alberto was over and they went out in the evening and he didn't return until Sunday at 11:46pm and went directly into his room.
     I woke up early the next morning to go talk to him but he was gone. I called him up at work and what left his mouth literally made me die inside.
     "I hope this is an emergency, you know the rules."
He said coldly and I hung up— I fucking hung up on him. I couldn't bring myself to utter a word.

Now I was heading back on a Saturday. I was really going to try with every bone in my body to talk to him. The closer I got to his mansion the more my heartbeat increased.
     With the way things were going, I'd rather we called things off than continue on like this. It was even worse than before. This time his presence was even excluded from everything and it was sickening.
     The cab pulled over in front of his huge gate and I got out. I paid the hefty fair and waved off the Uber driver. I began to walk further in.
     He occasionally goes to his office on Saturdays so I was hoping it was one of those days because I wasn't bold enough yet. However, when I entered, I saw him sitting on the couch with a newspaper in his hand.
     "Hey," I said and he lifted his head.
     "Muna. . ."
He gave me a quick nod of acknowledgement and diverted his gaze back to the newspaper. I screwed my eyes tightly— it had to be now or never. 
     "Zayn can we t—"
I began to speak but got cut off.
     "—I'd call you if I need anything."
He said sternly, not once looking at me. My heart skipped a beat at the harshness of his voice. The old me would have nodded and left but not this time. I was going to stand my grounds no matter what he does or says.
     "No but it's really important that we talk. I'm very so—"
I was insisting but his frown kept getting deeper.
     "—I said I will call you if I need anything Muna."
He seethed calmly— tossing his newspaper to the side to look at me. No matter how angry he looked, there was a look in his eyes that resembled the exact way he used to look at me just a week ago. I knew there was still something there.
     "Then why am I here? You never talk to me, you're always out, I might as well not be here."
I said frustratedly and he shook his head in disbelief.
     "Frankly you're the one that wants to be here." 
     "—It's in the damn contract."
     "No, it isn't, not in the one you fucking signed."
I remained silent as everything dawned on me. To him there might as well not be a contract because it has already been breached.
     "What are you afraid of? Everything was going in the fucking right direction and just like that, you flipped a damn switch."
He asked and I chuckled.

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