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And I had to give up on you Even though I didn't  want to- Dyingful

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And I had to give up on you
Even though I didn't  want to
- Dyingful


I puffed my cheek and sighed the next second. I really didn't want to talk to her but didn't want to come across as a bitch even though I had every damn reason to be a bitch towards her.
"Listen, I have nothing against you. I'm barely even angry at you but from one woman to another, I would have never— never gotten in bed with a man who was currently with another woman no matter how much I love him."
I emphasized the never just so she'd understand how low that was. I wasn't angry at her but I just couldn't wrap my head around how a woman could do that to her fellow woman.
I'm such a fucking hypocrite though because I let Zayn intimately touch me when he was with Lilja but I'd like to believe that's different. It was a contract where as I'm his actual girlfriend— his woman.
"But hey, I don't need a sorry from you. You're good."
I smiled and stormed away before she could reply. I was just satisfied that she heard what I had to say. Had it been Cheryl, I know for a fact that she would've ripped her hair out.

However, my short speech didn't make me feel any better. I didn't even bother to excuse myself as I just walked pass everyone— straight for the room that Zayn and I shared. I wanted to get my phone and my stuff to transfer them into Waliyha's room until Nicholas was ready to leave. I'm sure she wouldn't mind.
I had no idea what I was thinking. Immediately I entered the room, I felt a pang of pain in my chest like sharp nails trying to claw their way out. I had been with him on that same bed just the day before.
Like a flood, everything came crashing back into my memory. A sting I didn't even feel from the beginning somehow found me and I instantly broke into tears. I was hurting so badly, unlike anything I'd ever experienced. I always knew he'd hurt me but damn I never anticipated it in such a way.
I shook my head furiously and grabbed my phone from the drawer. Exactly as I thought, there were several missed calls and text messages from Cheryl. Originally they were calm and full of worry but later she began to get aggressive as to why the fuck I wasn't answering her calls and how she'd fucking end Zayn if anything happens to me. In a room that brought me so much painful memories, she managed to make me crack a smile— from miles away.
I don't know what I'd ever do without her.

I wanted to call her to hear her voice but I didn't want to know what she'd have to say. I didn't want to hear about the things she would say about Zayn. So I just sent her a quick text, apologizing for not answering her calls and promised to call her back.
I began to pack my stuff, entering the bathroom to grab my toothbrush and body products but I heard the door open and close and I literally froze.
Malik.
I couldn't actually move my body but I was just calm, calmer than I thought I'd be. Making up my mind to close the chapter in my life that had Zayn written in it yesterday made today's event less painful than what I know for sure it would have felt like if otherwise. I knew he was waiting for me in the bedroom but I took my precious time.
I washed my face to clear every evidence of the tears before I slowly made my way to the bedroom to face him. He was seated with his face buried in his palms but immediately he felt my presence, he shot up.
All we did was look at each other for what felt like decades but in actual facts, it was barely a minute. I smiled weakly because I came to the conclusion that what was the point?— What was the point of holding on to such anger towards him?

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