My Destiny (Book 1)

MD 42 - WHAT NOW?

| LUCAS LEDESMA |

"Yesh?" naglilinis na kami nang tawagin ko siya. "Sorry."

"For what?" she asked, back on me.

"Kung pumasok ako sa kwarto mo. But honest, I really didn't do anything. Inihiga lang talaga kita—"

She put up her hand, cutting my words. "Ang pangit pakinggan, huwag mo na ituloy. I already know you didn't do anything. But still, don't do it again. I hate it when someone gets into my personal space without my permission."

I nodded, I totally understand that. Lahat naman siguro tayo ayaw nang nakukumpirmiso ang privacy natin. "Sorry ulit." I heaved. It was a relief that she didn't get mad. Sa totoo lang no'ng nagalit siya kanina, something stirred up inside me and no matter how I hard try to comprehend it, I just couldn't explain what it is. I continued staring at her. Maybe... there's something I can do to make it up to her? "Yesha?"

"Ano na naman?" Her voice went up a bit. Ang sungit talaga. Wala pa nga akong sinasabi.

"Ihahatid ka ba ulit ni Seb?"

She made a small nod. "Hatid-sundo for a week. Ang galing ng kaibigan mo, eh."

I pursed my lips. "Hindi pwedeng ako na lang?" I asked, softer than I intended to. Hindi naman kasi madali ang magtanong sa kanya ng mga ganitong bagay. I don't know what I'll get from her. It's nerve-wracking!

Itinigil nito ang ginagawa at humarap sa akin. "Bakit ba gusto mong ikaw ang maghatid sa akin?"

"Eh 'di huwag!" Agad kong bawi. Potek! Kailangan ng damage control! Ano bang nangyayari sa'kin? I just wanted to make up for my mistake. 'Yon lang naman. Pero bakit puro kasungitan ang nakukuha ko? "Nagpiprisinta na nga ako ayaw mo pa," I mumbled.

"Wow ha!" she replied sarcastically. Narinig niya pala.

I sighed—a deep one. I pursed my lips. Again! I think it'll be better if I tell her the truth. Mas madali 'yon. Besides, baka kung ano na iniisip niya. "I feel bad for what I did. Mali kasi talaga kahit pa si Ellie ang nagsabi, dapat hindi ako pumayag. However, I was worried that you cried and I just wanted for you to rest comfortably." There I said it! Siguro mawawala na rin kung ano man 'tong nasa loob ko. Dahil pucha naiirita na ako. "Having said that, I..." I breathe deeply again, "...I just wanted to do something that can at least make up for my mistake."

Dahan-dahan siyang lumapit. At sa bawat hakbang niya, palakas din nang palakas ang kabog ng dibdib ko. What the fvck, Lucas! Ni wala nga siyang ekspresyon habang lumalapit pero bakit kung makakabog ang dibdib ko, parang papunta na ako sa ibang mundo.

She stopped in front of me. And damn it! She's so close! So close that our bodies are almost touching! Akala ko ba ayaw niyang may nakakapasok sa personal space niya? Ahh oo nga pala, it's okay as long as she permits it. Pero paano naman ang personal space ko?!

Bahagya akong lumayo pero agad niyang hinawakan ang kamay ko at hinila ako pabalik. She stared. For a full 60 seconds, 'yon lang ang ginawa niya. No expression. No emotion. Nothing! She just stared. And I don't even know how I managed to count how long she stared.

Finally, a smile crept across her face. And fvck whatever is this feeling inside me. Sa simpleng ngiti niyang 'yon, lalong nagkagulo sa loob ko.

Because that wasn't just a smile, it was a sweet sweet smile—directed to you. Only to you. My mind answered.

"You're worried about me?" I was taken aback by her question.

"B-Bakit naman ako mag-aalala sa 'yo?"

She laughed heartily. Wala na, tuluyan na talaga akong nanlumo. Hindi ko alam kung nagkakagulo lang ba talaga sa loob ko o gyera na ang nangyayari.