The Secret Life of Malia Dallas

Chapter 53: White

Chapter 53: White

Recap

"Well there's no easy way to say this," She said quietly but we could all hear her. "It's back."

Two words and my world practically shattered in front of my eyes.

Malia's POV

It was white. They always were. Everything was white. White was supposed to be happy. White was for weddings. This is a different kind of white. This white drags you on the ground and not like a wedding train. I took a deep breath before putting my hand on the doorknob and twisting it. I didn't go in. I didn't let the door finish opening. I held it. About three inches, I held it open. I squeezed my eyes shut taking another deep breath before just looking through the three inches.

You can do this Malia. Be strong. For him. With one last breath I quickly stepped into the room and shut the door quietly holding my breath like the air could kill me. Once the door was closed I leaned against it and let out my breath as I sunk to the cold tile floor.

For once I ignored the cold, I didn't care how it stung my skin and gave me goose bumps making me want to shrink. I let my bare legs feel the cold. I finally stood up and walked over to the bed. The beeping! How could I not mention the beeping, it was so annoying to hear but right now it was a sign. A sign that he was still alive. My breathing was unsteady as I set my bag gently on the chair next to the hospital bed. I didn't bother sitting down.

He was asleep. Just asleep. I bit my lip to keep some sort of control over myself. I pulled the blanket up a little higher to keep him warmer before sitting on the bed being sure not to hurt him. I touched his hand and it was warm. Mine were cold and sweaty. I didn't want my body temperature to effect his. I found a blanket and put my hand in the blanket before holding his hand in my blanket covered hand. I sniffled a little bit but no tears fell. I looked up at the ceiling to see more depressing white. I quickly looked away from the ceiling and at his face.

"Remember when I was little and mom and dad would bring me and Cam over to visit you guys? I would spend all day making puzzles on the carpet floor. Then when it was time to go to sleep you had this big book with golden tipped pages. I thought it was so pretty," I said with a small laugh. "I would always go looking for you and ask you to read it to me. You would always tell me that you couldn't read all of them. No matter how many times I begged you, you wouldn't. So when I finally got it into my head that I could only have one I always picked the same one. The one about the princess and the maid. With the mix-up about the ring. I loved that one," I said as I smiled remembering all the times I sat on his lap and he read to me. "I remember one time you asked me if I wanted to hear a different story and I had said no. I didn't like trying new things because I only had one story and I didn't want to waste it. But I remember you convinced me to listen to a story of your choice. It was the one about the seven brothers. They each had a special power. One could become a tornado, one could swallow anything, one could grow legs, one had eyes in the back of his head," I said with a sad smile. "You taught me how to tie my shoe. We would always walk down to the field that had horses in it together with Cam. You're a great grandpa gramps," I said with a smile that was getting heavier and heavier.

I jumped a little when I heard the door open. I turned to see it was Grammie and Cam. I looked down into my lap and wiped my nose a little bit.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to take up so much time," I said as I carefully got off of the bed. I walked over to Gramps and I gave him a kiss on the forehead. I wanted to stay in the room but at the same time I didn't. But I left the room to give Cam and grammie some time with him.

When I got out of the room it was still there. All of it was still there. The stomach cancer, the white, the cold tiles, everything. Nothing felt better or worse. It was all numb. I sat down next to the door to the room just staring at the wall across from me.