49 ~ Realization

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"What do you mean?" I asked him confused, as I didn't fully understood what he was saying. Of course I can get pregnant again. "I mean you can't get pregnant anymore, because of what they did to you." I know I must stare at him like he has two heads but that was what I was feeling now. I didn't even know what they had done to me to be honest as I was passed out.

"I don't even know what they have done to me." I said worried but apparently it was a lot, as I couldn't get pregnant anymore. I felt the tears run over my face but I still didn't fully grasp the situation. "You don't?" Harry asked and I really didn't know, this was probably because they had drugged me the entire time I was there.

"No, I was in so much pain that I must've blacked out I guess."

"You poor thing, come here." He pulled me into his arms and kissed my head. I was fully sobbing now as the realisation dawned on me. I could never have a biological child anymore, they just took that away from me. "We can adopt you know, if that is what you want but I want you to know that I will never leave you."

"Not even now you know I can never have your child?" I could recall the fear of that when I was in that horrible house. "I will never leave you and we will figure everything out." He assured me and it made me love him even more.

We sat there in that chair for god knows how long. Harry had fallen asleep and this gave me the chance to walk around the house. I walked into the hallway and that's when I saw the door to the nursery. I felt my feet move towards the room. I stopped when I was in the door opening and I just stared into the room. It was beautifully decorated. The wall hold every Disney story and that lovely rocking chair, where I would sit with my baby was also there waiting for me to use it but I wasn't going to anymore.

I let myself fall in the middle of the room and I was experiencing extreme pain but this time it was pain from being heart broken. I cried tears for the baby I lost and for the fact that I couldn't get pregnant anymore. I cried and cried till there was nothing left.

At a certain point I felt Harry's arms around me and he placed me between his legs and just hold me. He didn't say a word but just kept me warm and loved. I wanted to have that baby so badly and to have it ripped out of you like that is pure torture.

I just don't know how I could survive this right now but then it dawned on me that it wasn't only me who lost her child, Harry had also lost his child and I turned myself around and placed my right hand on his cheek. He leaned into that hand and kissed it. "I'm so sorry." He understood why I was saying that and that's when he kissed me. Eventually he lifted me into his arms and brought me back to our room, where he put me into bed.

He tucked me in and kissed me once more on the lips, before he walked away. He didn't close the door and I didn't mind because this way I had the feeling that I wasn't locked up. I was feeling extremely tired after all that and the next thing I know Harry is waking me up.

"Sam, I made you some dinner." I opened my eyes and looked into his green eyes, which weren't sparkling, normally they did sparkle but now they were looking sad and tired. "You should get some sleep as well." I said whilst taking the tray from his hands. He nodded and got in bed with me. He had made dinner for himself and together we ate it in bed. We were watching telly under dinner, when I saw him fall asleep. I stood up from the bed and put the tray away.

I couldn't sleep yet as I already slept halfway through the day. I decided to put on a movie. I picked out one of my favourites series. I began with "Harry Potter and the philosophers Stone" but I just didn't get tired so I ended up watching them all.

And if you watched them all, you know I didn't sleep at night. I was almost bouncing of the bed, which was weird as I was still under medication, maybe that was the problem. I felt Harry stir beside me and when I glanced over at him, I saw that he was observing me.

"You haven't slept, have you?"

"No but I tried."

"You should go to sleep because you need it to heal."

"Maybe I just have to take a sleeping pill then."

"I will get you one but this is just an exception as you know how dangerous they can be."

"I know." But he was already up and gone. When he came back he had breakfast with him and a large glass of water, with a pill next to it. "you have to swallow this and don't bite it, because that is just really disgusting." I nodded and took the pill from him. I put it on my tongue and grabbed my water. Whilst swallowing it. I started on breakfast, I felt myself getting drowsy when I was halfway through breakfast so Harry quickly pulled the tray away from me and lay me down on my pillow.

"Sweet dreams, Love."

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