Vista - Attack on Titan x Reader

CHAPTER EIGHTY THREE: The Right

Life beyond the world of walls, huh?

I had been thinking about it ever since we had returned after listening in on the others when they had gotten back from their trip to the cellar. With our horses decimated, we had ridden Eren back to Wall Rose, and I had kept to myself. The cheers of the people, praising what they saw as a victory, had almost been to much. I had escaped that as soon as possible.

Almost two weeks had passed since then, and between lengthy, droning court meetings and discussions about Grisha Jaeger's notebooks, I bided my time hiding out at Verena Jinn's. I told her everything, from my personal issues to the reveal and death of my father, and she treated me no different. If anything, she seemed to treat me even more like her own daughter.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you, dear?" I watched our reflections as Verena stood behind me, combing my (H/C) hair out. I had been summoned to the palace for an awards ceremony. The few survivors of the Shiganshina expedition were being praised for their bravery, and I hated the idea of it.

"Thanks, but I just...I don't want this to be a big deal..." I confessed, my leg bobbing, crossed over my knee. "There isn't anything heroic about sending hundreds to their deaths...or anyone..." Humming her solemn understanding, Verena stepped back and motioned for me to stand and follow her. Doing as instructed, I watched her pull something out of the closet.

"This was one of Eld's formal uniforms. He had two, so I took the liberty of adjusting it to fit you." She explained, her smile soft and kind. Swallowing hard, I stared at it, both touched and grief-stricken.
"Rena...I...you didn't have to..." It meant more than she could have ever imagined. It was her late son's, so the fact that she had changed it, just for my sake, was enough to nearly make me burst into tears.

"I wanted to, and I'm sure he would have suggested it himself if he were here. Now, try it on, love! At least let me get a good look at you before you head off!" Obliging her, I took off my cardigan and slipped it on, letting her do up the buttons and admire the sight of me. "Oh, you look gorgeous...I feel like a proud mama again..."

A mother...

Releasing a shaky breath, I pulled her into a tight hug, squishing my cheek against her bosom. It wasn't exactly like home, but it was close enough. It was something I needed. A mother figure, to keep me grounded. She hadn't taken a step back when I had admitted to realising new romantic feelings. She had soothed me, given advice, even praised me.
"Darling heart, you're going to make me get all emotional!"

Clearing my throat, I parted from her, using the heel of my hand to wipe at my glossy eyes.
"Sorry...okay, I guess I better head off. Thank you, Verena. I mean it. Do, uh, you want me to get anything while I'm gone? They have good meat in the capitol."

Making sure that I had everything important, I checked myself over. Marco's bracelet, Eld's hair tie, Erwin's bolo tie and his patch. Everything was there.
"No need to go out of your way, dear. It's already such a busy day for you." She started out of the room, and I waved over my shoulder as I headed towards the door.
"Alright, I heard venison and pork!"

I had chosen to ride to the capitol on a horse I had borrowed from the Survey Corps stable, taking my time so I didn't have to mingle with the guests before the ceremony. We didn't deserve medals. We didn't deserve praise. Most of us shouldn't have even been alive.

The trip took less time than I would have liked, and I dawdled to and from the stable, even taking the time to feed and water my horse before entering the palace. Even the corridors were bustling, and I kept my head down, making my way to the throne room.

"(Y/N)! Hey, over here!" Jean was the first to see me, and much to my dismay he brought attention to me with his shout. Internally groaning, I made my way over, opting to stand between Sasha and Connie. Both Eren and Mikasa looked at me, almost in a nervous way.