Vista - Attack on Titan x Reader

CHAPTER EIGHTY FOUR: From a Different View

I hadn't stayed after the ceremony.

After Eren had some strange kind of episode whilst kissing Historia's hand, I fled the palace, leading my horse off into the market square to pick up some things for Verena. It was the very least I could do for her. She worked hard, and there was very little meat besides poultry and rabbit where she lived within Wall Rose. She deserved something nice.

Packing the salted pork and some beef chuck steaks into my saddlebag, I also purchased her a pretty, sheer shaul, as well as some fresh bread. One thing Verena prided herself in was her cooking. It kind of reminded me of Jean's mother. Every time I had attempted to help, she had shooed me away, insisting she wanted to be the one to provide for me.

"You're home early, love! How was it?" She greeted me with a smile, already on me and removing my coat before I had even shut the door.
"Tense...A lot was said before it started..." I sighed, holding up the bag of goods. "Fresh meat, bread, and a little something extra." Of course, I was given a lighthearted lecture about not spending my money on her, but she was thankful.

"So, did you speak with Captain Levi? I understand if you didn't, but I think it would benefit the both of you if you sat down and had a heart to heart." She hummed as she tottered into the kitchen, and I followed her, leaning against the door frame.

"I...don't think it's a good idea yet...I know I'll say something I shouldn't. The last thing anyone needs right now is more shit-"
"Language!"
"Sorry...Uh, well, you know what I mean. I can't even talk to the others right now...not after today. I just need time..."

Problem is, I'm not sure how much of that we have left...

Verena, after placing the food down upon the counter, walked up to me and took my face in her hands, her warm, motherly gaze easing my mind, just a little.
"Sometimes, you just need to say what's on your mind, no matter how brutal it may be. He'd understand, love. That man has a cold front, but I'm sure he needs to speak, too."

I let her fawn over me for a while, squishing my cheeks and fixing my hair, but eventually I stepped away, stretching my arms over my head.
"I think I might go for a ride. Do you mind? I might not make it back in time for dinner." I felt bad, but I needed space. A while to just think, and be.

"I'll be sure to save you a plate, dear. Just stay safe, and try not to do anything too reckless, okay?" She gave me a tight hug, and I smiled a little, reciprocating just as hard.
"Okay, I"ll try..."

That may have been a little white lie.

At the outer gate of Wall Rose, I waited patiently for the Garrison to let me out. Now that I was an official captain, and because Hange, the new Commander, had given me permission, I didn't have to have a reason to leave.

It was a silent agreement, but I appreciated it. The others would worry, but they weren't my concern. I knew my way around, and there were fewer titans these days. There was nothing to worry about.
"(Y/N)! Wait up!"

Except that.

Internally groaning, I glanced over my shoulder to find Jean jogging up beside me, panting as he leaned against my horse's flank.
"Something wrong?" I asked with a sigh, giving him a chance to catch his breath.
"Uh, yes?! You're seriously going out on your own? Again?!"

Rolling my eyes, I felt kind of bad for not wanting to speak to him. He hadn't done anything wrong, but I felt like I just couldn't be around him, or any of them.
"I know what I'm doing, and you know it. Just a quick trip, and I'll be back before nightfall."

Jean's eyes were searching the depths of mine, and I felt even worse. He was worried, and it didn't help that I refused to talk about it.
"Then I'm coming with y-"
"Nope. You're staying put, Kirstein." I cut him off quickly, backing my horse up a few paces as the gate began to open.