Dream SMP Random One Shots

Phyc log 4 Project Shadowed

All the following was documented the day of the return from the battle of Oscuras. Insurgents led by Wilbur Minecraft assisted by General Bad and Commander Antfrost attacked the Pillager land and took back the carried (redacted). Clearance level Alonzo codes required to read the following retelling. For the sake of the recorder's sanity Project Shadowed will be abbreviated to PS.

Alyssa: I've been told you are refusing medical treatment.

PS: I don't need medical treatment, I can take care of myself.

Alyssa: Will you at least give us your date of birth?

PS: Springtime

Alyssa: That's not a date. Age?

PS: Young.

Alyssa: Your not very helpful.

PS: That's the goal :)

Alyssa: Don't you want us to find your family?

PS: Ranboo is my family, and now Schlatt is too.

Alyssa: Elaborate?

PS: No.

This is getting hard to watch.

Alyssa: What do you know about Fundy?

PS: He has Peter's location. Peter's important.

Alyssa: You mean Thomas?

PS: Yes, Thomas. Doesn't matter. I protected Fundy, did my job.

Alyssa: You're rather detached. 

PS: It's how I function best. I spent almost an entire year blind.

Alyssa: What happened?

PS: I'm an experiment, all the special projects are blindfolded once their powers are known. Sight keeps us functional, without it we are rather helpless. They can't permanently blind us, special project's eyes have quick natural regeneration

Alyssa: How do you know all of this?

PS: I'm not the first project, there were others, and I have had someone attempt to blind me.

Alyssa: Sounds awful.

PS: What were you expecting?

Alyssa: I'm not sure.

PS: Go get another job softie.

Everyone in the room seemed rather agitated after that comment.

Alyssa: What did you do before the Pillager Outpost?

PS: I survived.

Alyssa: Any detail?

PS: No.

Alyssa: Will you let us check up on you health wise after this?

PS: Probably not unless I spontaneously collapse.

Alyssa: Why are you so against the idea of being helped?

PS: It's not helping, it's getting in my way.

...

Alyssa: How did you become a project?

PS: I was abducted, and brought to the outpost. Got stabbed right in here with a syringe.

Participant pointed to his heart.

Alyssa: Does everyone survive the process?

PS: No, before me there was a set of twins. One of them died before the first stage completed. The other died next to me a couple hours later.

Alyssa: How are you so calm about this?

PS: I have to get all the bad questions out of the way before you bring in Ranboo. He gets anxious a lot, don't ask him much. If you do I recommend getting him something to write with. He forgets, it was a problem when we were moving Fundy through the forest.

Alyssa: According to some of the others Ponk is your brother, is this true?

PS: Yes, so?

Alyssa: Don't you have anything more to say?

PS: No I fucking do not.

Alyssa: Can you at least tell me issues I should look out for? Schlatt is a new experiment correct?

PS: We all have heart issues to an extent. Those can be a real bitch but from what I've seen if he's lived this long they shouldn't be fatal. I'm guessing he's going to have a sensitivity to sound. Ranboo cannot teleport more than three times in a row without passing out. I don't know how any of this changes in a new environment though. Try your luck.

Alyssa: That's rather terrifying.

PS: Get a new job.

Alyssa: Alright I'm done.

The rest of the interviews are slated for a later date. Tomorrow or the next day, I don't know to be exact. Alyssa would like to give them a little time to rest, and probably scream her lungs out.