Opia / D.M 18+

A G L I O P H O B I A

{The fear of getting hurt}

✧✦✧

~Draco~

I could feel her eyes as she studied me, and I couldn't help but let my eyes find hers. We just stood there, our hands still intertwined. I studied her too, watching closely for anything, any small hint of something. I had no clue what I was looking for, what I was searching to find, but she was searching for something too, some hint of betrayal possibly. I could tell she still felt as though she couldn't trust me, even as we stood and stared, I hadn't proven to her that I could be trusted, that I had changed completely. 

She knew I had changed, but I still slept with countless other girls in the school. I still played hearts like an instrument, one I would never play again. Maybe I was the devil in some aspects, and an angel in others. Both good and bad, both the villain and the hero. I knew I was a top tier manipulator, constantly on my toes, looking for my next move. 

She watched carefully as I conjured a green blanket, just like the one that was laid out on the hill the first time I took her there. I still held her hand in mine as I guided her to sit with me. I rested back on my elbows as she crossed her legs, looking out towards the black lake while I looked at the sky above. 

My eyes travelled from the sky above to look at her, to watch her carefully as she breathed deeply, taking in the scenery before us. I wanted more than anything to be normal, to hold her in my arms and tell her everything would be alright. But it wasn't normal, and it wouldn't be for a very long time. Everything had changed for me, my life at home and at Hogwarts weren't far apart. Blaise and I had taken the mark, changing our lives forever. It would haunt us for as long as we lived. 

It itched as I stared at her, I could feel the slight burn it left me with. I knew I was rejecting it, my body and mind couldn't completely give in to the dark magic that threatened to poison me. If only she knew. She was the one holding me together, the one constant in my life. Seeing her every day held me together, kept the light within me so I couldn't let the dark in. She was the only thing, the only person who could help. And I hated to think that it had something to do with her name, I hated to think that I could possibly be using her. 

That was why I carried the small amethyst with me wherever I went. 

But I knew it wasn't just the crystal, nor her name. I knew it was her. Just her that held me together, that stopped me from giving in to the dark temptations. It was a constant battle, a constant struggle to maintain the light within. The darkness was beginning to take over, and I needed her more than I ever thought I needed someone in my life. She was a reminder that there was still good in the world. Her parents weren't caught in the same trap as mine, they never held the same mark. They were good, even if they constantly left her alone with no explanation. It was better than being sided with him.

She shifted slightly as she remained looking outward towards the lake, I could hear a small gasp as she lifted her hand to inspect it carefully. I sat up almost instantly, looking from her furrowed brows to her hand. The bandages were still wrapped around it carefully while she scrunched her nose at the sudden pain she felt. I wanted more than anything to take the pain away, but I didn't know the charm to fix it completely, she'd have to go to Pomfrey. 

"Are you alright?" I asked delicately, wondering to myself if there was anything I could do to help her. 

She sighed quietly, inspecting her hand as she moved her fingers slowly, "I'll be alright, it just hurts a little," Her voice came out in a whisper.

She bit her bottom lip as she moved the bandage carefully before dropping her hand and lying down to face the sky above, "Why'd you take here, Malfoy?" She asked, keeping her eyes strictly towards the pinholes in the sky.