𝑹𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒓𝒂 • yeonbin {BOOK 2} ✓

°•❁𝒕𝒘𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒚 𝒐𝒏𝒆❁•°

°•°•❁•°•°
•°❁°•

°•𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 • mention of maternal death, mention of depression•°

°•❁•°
°•°•❁•°•°

𝒀𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒋𝒖𝒏 was sat on the ground, back resting on the cave's wall, and soobin was between his legs while leaned on his chest. both were silent, appreciating the beauty of the place before having to leave.

"danny?" the angel spoke softly, not sure if he should break the comfortable silence. yeonjun had his arms wrapped around him and soobin started to play with his fingers gently while waiting for an answer, he got only a simple hum in return. "can you tell me more about her?"

"why?" soobin bit his lip, throwing his head back to fall on the red haired's shoulder and nuzzling his nose on his neck, feeling the comforting smell the older had.

"she's a big part of you, you hold her in your heart and... i want to know as many parts of you as i can." the demon let out a breath through his nose, closing his eyes while leaning his head on the wall. it was unfair, he wanted to know soobin too, but there wasn't a point into doing it, not when he couldn't have any part he possibly started to know.

"she was the kindest person i ever met, with the warmest smile. i already told you, but she liked flowers a lot, i never knew why, but she just did. i actually remember to ask her one day, why she cared about some random plants so much, but she gave me just a vague answer, something about how they understood her, how they helped her breathe. of course, when i was a kid i didn't get what she meant, but i do now." yeonjun opened his eyes, staring at the woman's coffin. "she could be the kindest, but she wasn't the happiest. she needed to find peace for her mind, to not break, not go insane, so she took care of the flowers, gently and carefully, she watched they grow, bloom and die."

soobin hummed, nodding his head softly as if telling the other that he was listening. because he was, the angel was paying attention in every letter from every word, and every little emotion that could be hidden between the syllables. yeonjun was talking about something he never did, so the black haired wanted to memorize everything, even the raise of yeonjun's chest against his back when the male breathed. everything seemed important.

"she watched them do what she couldn't, buried them with what she felt and let them bloom again so she could keep on going. it was her way of keeping herself alive, breathing, for me, for ruby, for herself. i could see in her eyes since i was little, how they were the warmest, but could get so empty i sometimes wondered if she was breathing. when i noticed the warmth lasted longer when she was with the flowers, i started to ask her to teach me about them, she looked less tired and with lighter shoulders when doing so."

"when ruby was born, things got worse. she got sick, physically, and added with how depressed she was, it could never end in good. i was too young to understand, my father was so obsessed with power he didn't even look at her and she felt the need to hide it to not worry me or affect the newborn. no one knew she was sick, until it got too bad to be unnoticed."

"i was six when she couldn't even get up from the bed, sometimes i cleaned her with a wet cloth because i saw some nurses doing it, but they didn't seem to do it with care, nor gently. she would mostly just stare at the wall when i was doing it, as if she couldn't even realize i was there, but every time she for some reason averted her eyes to me, they seemed to shine for a second, getting filled with warmth again. i made i promise to myself to never leave her, to never let her hurt more than she already was. she took a year like that."

"ruby said she knew she was going to die the day it happened, i knew it too. i went to her room, after the nurses had redone the enchantment on her arm that gave her the nutrients she needed since she couldn't eat anything. she patted the bed softly, asking for me to sit with her, and laid her head on my shoulder while interviewing our hands. then she told me, she told me she would leave, she asked for my forgiveness for not being able to hold more, to take care of me and ruby. i forgave her, of course i did. i think it was what she was waiting before she could die, before she could finally rest and stop hurting."

"i only cried on the day it happened. the next day i realized it was the best thing that could've happen to her, so she could be okay, be happy. i had seven, but somehow i understood, that i'd rather suffer myself without my mother, my whole world, than asking for her to live that way again. ruby was only three, she wouldn't miss her that much after a couple of years, so i did my best to make her forget the empty space my mom left, until i was disinherited that is."

"i haven't seem her for fifteen years, haven't been able to tell her my day or how things were going, but i could never forget her. my mother was probably the most precious person i had, she still is, will ever be. though, i keep on wishing my father hadn't ruined her like he did, breaking her into pieces and taking them from her every time, leaving her too empty to be able to mend the cracks. i keep on wishing i could see her genuinely happy a single time, but knowing i can't. i guess flowers indeed suited her after all, pretty, delicate and with a short lifespan."

soobin sniffled, pulling away from the older and turning around before hugging him closely. the red haired smiled softly, wrapping his arms around the male and rubbing his back gently. yeonjun heard the angel calming down, his breathing normalizing and shoulders stopping to shake, and pulled away, using his hands to clean the younger's wet face softly.

"don't cry, love. everything's fine." the black haired couldn't possibly comprehend, he couldn't even begin to understand how yeonjun was standing before him without breaking down, how his eyes were dry and hands weren't trembling. he couldn't understand how the demon was able to take it, alone, as a kid, and with everything that followed after.

"danny?" soobin looked at the red haired, putting his hands on the male's cheeks and staring at his red eyes. yeonjun answered with a small 'yes?' but the angel kept quiet for a while, searching through the blood pools trapped on the older's irises.

the taller looked for it, for what he was able to see when staring at the male, for what he was able to reach, to feel. his soul. hidden so deeply he almost couldn't find it every time he looked, so discreet he almost got lost in the stare frequently, but still there, every time, just as pained as it always was when he would find it.

"can you promise me something?"

"what is it?"

"break danny, it's okay. you don't have to be strong all the time, let yourself feel, please." soobin caressed the male's face softly, smiling at him. "and i promise i will be here to pick your pieces every time, so we can mend them together."

"and who's going to pick yours, soobin?" yeonjun searched through the other eyes, any sign that could give him the answer he needed. he wanted soobin to let him in, to let him see, to let him have his heart. so he searched, for any sign of the three words he craved to hear.

"i will let you do it. i will let you pick them for me."

yeonjun didn't know what it was, maybe not love, but it was there, shining at him like if it was crystal clear tears under the light.

and it was everything he needed.

°•°•❁•°•°