𝑹𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒓𝒂 • yeonbin {BOOK 2} ✓

°•❁𝒉𝒖𝒏𝒅𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒏𝒆❁•°

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°•𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 • this chapter contains smut scenes. feel free to skip it if you're not comfortable, there's nothing relevant to the plot•°

°•this chapter is NOT entirely a smut, so if u usually skips smuts, you might want to read this until certain point•°

°•SAFE WORD • RED•°

°•𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒔 • unprotected sex•°

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𝑻𝒉𝒆 overwhelming and constant intense amount of emotions yeonjun felt every moment could leave him borderline ill and numb at the same time, as if he was getting suffocated for so long he couldn't even remember how to breathe. most times, all of that gather of strong feelings left him unable to enjoy everything else, not when he hurt for every person around him, worried for every mistake he could make, feared every possible wound he could be the reason behind and every lack of happiness in others even when he himself couldn't have it. yeonjun felt for others, but others couldn't make him feel for himself and so, he didn't.

the first time his heart sped up and he was melted by warmth was when he stared at soobin's brown eyes under the simple light of a room, when the angel carried a small smile that didn't show any teeth nor strong emotion. it was when soobin was just there, in a common day, with common clothes and not doing anything but just being, it was then he felt for himself above for anyone else. it was then he took his first breath after suffocating for years, it was then he understood, minimally, why people wanted to live so much.

it was then he feared dying instead of living for the first time.

yeonjun felt the same speed of his heart and same warmth now, the same sensation of breathing fresh air and want for living. there, with the same brown eyes staring at him and same small smile, and he was sure that there was no need of pretty sunsets and beautiful flowers with soobin, there was no need for sweet words and whispered promises, no need for confessions and big romantic acts, because the most beautiful thing he could have and feel with soobin, was living. it was having a common day, with common clothes and without doing anything but being, together.

he gently placed both hands on the black haired's face, caressing his cheeks with his thumbs while completely mesmerized by how the simple aspect of existing felt beautiful when he was with soobin. then he smiled, he smiled because somehow he understood, for the first time, what his mother fully meant by having someone as a flower, it wasn't just someone who would be his pretty moment of life, it wasn't just someone who would make even dying beautiful. it was someone who would turn every breath into a bless, every heartbeat into a beautiful melody, every second into forever and every moment into the simplicity of existing, just existing. it was someone who would teach him that living wasn't being happy, it was feeling, everything of himself and around him, everything he loved and hated. it was waking up, taking a deep breath and comprehending he couldn't have everything, but that he too didn't need everything, because that simple act of waking up was enough, because being was enough, because trying was already enough and he didn't need results or an everlasting elation. he just needed now, that second, then the next one and the next. his flower was someone who would turn existing, with all hurt and mistakes in between, the most beautiful thing he could ever find.

yeonjun lost himself in that moment, that moment of bliss where every breath he took felt tender and right, where soobin's chocolate irises glistened as if covered by stardust, where his mind was quiet and void of the million thoughts he always had, where he found peace. the angel furrowed slightly with the lack of words and intense stare, ready to ask what happened, but before having the chance to, the king let out a small laugh, eyes shining with tears as he felt free, as he experienced the liberty of just being.