𝑹𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒓𝒂 • yeonbin {BOOK 2} ✓

°•❁𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒚 𝒇𝒊𝒗𝒆❁•°

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°•𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 • blood, suicidal thoughts, self-hatred, self-punishment, depressing thoughts, mental instability, identity issues•°

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𝑩𝒆𝒐𝒎𝒈𝒚𝒖 sighed, he had been searching for days but was always led to the same lack of answers. the gargoyle had made his goal to find a way of helping yeonjun externally, but it was hard to when he didn't have access to the castle anymore, nor did he know what the demon had. he thought searching about royal powers could help, hoping to maybe find something about a consequence of having powers or even a case of an ability being related to one's insanity. there was nothing, however, nothing at all, and the male was starting to lose his hopes.

added to that was the fact there was no recent news from his acquaintances in the castle, who usually gave him information about yeonjun's state and doings, and the lack of words made him anxious. the last time he talked with the king he was already bad, too bad even, but it was only logical to assume he would be even worse now, way more after the fiasco that happened in the ball between kingdoms.

it worried him to the core, he could not understand yeonjun a lot, but he still knew him, so he knew the male was way too deep in himself, way too lost. yeonjun was always an egocentric person, maybe from his birth place or way he was raised until some point, so beomgyu knew that his obsession with power went even further because of his somewhat god complex. it wasn't just about the power, about being strong, it was about the thrilling of knowing he was better than others too, that no one could look down to him like everyone once did. it was a thin line between staying sane and turning into a sick monster, like hyukjun was.

and beomgyu was afraid the line wasn't even there anymore, being already crossed and long forgotten.

again, the thought of wishing taemin to be alive came to him, flooding his mind with sore memories of a mindful crystalian that did a way better job than him into helping yeonjun. it wasn't like beomgyu didn't see his own value, nor was like he didn't know his own importance to the king, but he knew that trying sometimes didn't bring you anywhere, and trying to understand and help yeonjun felt like one of those times.

taemin was careful, was understanding and observing, he could start to know you by only a couple of hours of talk. it was almost scaring, how the male used to stare with deep black eyes as if he knew everyone's thoughts, even the most secret and hidden ones, as if he knew all wishes and desires, but yet, accepted them as part of the person's being. beomgyu wished to be like that, even if only a little, because even if it sounded burdening and too much, it still provided the gift of understanding, and with it came the one of knowing how to help.

maybe then he would've been able to save both yeonjun and his own relationship.

taehyun. he was a frequent thought of beomgyu, always coming to his mind and making him both sad and calm. it was like even if away, the reaper still managed to make him relax, make him slow down for a moment, as if the long haired could hear taehyun's voice telling him he was doing okay and his soft lips kissing him in reassurance. then there was the younger's pretty eyes, his doe and big eyes that always appeared to make beomgyu's heart flutter, as if he was staring at every little constellation, every star and nebula he never managed to see in the sky. the blonde was, without a doubt, the most captivating person he had even seen, and he wanted to get lost between galaxies when he stared at the male.

what he wanted didn't matter now, however.

beomgyu closed the large book, one he had sneakily took before leaving the castle but had postponed the reading until now, and threw his head back, resting it on the chair. he was fully aware of the fact no one could help someone that didn't want to be helped, but still, he would never give up. the gargoyle owned his life to yeonjun, but even if he didn't, the male raised him when he didn't have a family to do so, fed him when be starved, held him when he cried and stayed with him even when he could've left. yeonjun could barely take care of himself, but he still took beomgyu under his care. so the younger would never give up on him, because once beomgyu was helpless too, once he was broken beyond repair too, once he was barely alive too and yeonjun was still there, until every crack mended, until every piece was picked, until life made itself worth it, until help wasn't needed anymore.