𝑹𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒓𝒂 • yeonbin {BOOK 2} ✓

°•❁𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒕𝒚❁•°

°•°•❁•°•°
•°❁°•

°•𝒕𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 • blood, depressing thoughts•°

°•❁•°
°•°•❁•°•°

𝑩𝒆𝒐𝒎𝒈𝒚𝒖 was growing desperate and with it came the thought that no, he couldn't handle seeing yeonjun dying in front of him. the gargoyle had just left the king's room because, again, he was faced with an insanity episode that didn't allow beomgyu's proximity. it was utterly disturbing, when the older switched in seconds from a smile to sick eyes, when he started to laugh lowly and hit his own head in what beomgyu assumed to be a try of staying sane.

the long haired groaned, grabbing the first thing he saw and throwing on the wall before letting his tears fall. they never stopped after that. he wanted to be there, to support yeonjun, to not let him die while completely alone, to spend the little time they had, together. beomgyu wanted that, but doing it all was proved way too much for him, harder than probably anything he ever did.

a week and a half.

that was the time he knew yeonjun last saw soobin, that was the time since he knew the demon gave up, that was little more time than he was there, watching his older brother by heart die slowly and painfully while having to hear every scream of it and see every drop of blood. at least now, yeonjun spent more time sane than whatever the other side was, he seemed to maybe be getting the hang of it, but it didn't mean anything when he hadn't anything to live for. beomgyu knew, by looking inside the red haired's empty and tired eyes, that he wanted to die, that he didn't mind the lack of time, that he wasn't scared of having his soul locked in hell while getting punished for his sins for more time than any other soul would. he could see yeonjun was ready to go, and maybe that was the worst.

beomgyu covered his face, trying to minimally control his lack of air and endless tears, it was hard to, however, seeing yeonjun dying was killing a part of him. the demon had pulled him out of a pit of emptiness and depression that he never thought to be able to escape from, a fragile and scared little kid that couldn't feel anything beyond fear and emptiness. beomgyu didn't have the privilege of a tranquil childhood, way less a fun one, but he knew the moment the demon boy with red hair and foxy eyes sat beside him and smiled in the warmest way ever, he started to live instead of surviving.

yeonjun was more than a safe place, and even if the gargoyle wasn't a scared kid anymore, the king still remained his salvation. beomgyu wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for yeonjun, he wouldn't be giving easy smiles and laughing loudly, he wouldn't meet the love of his life and finally understand why he had endured all the bad and twisted nights he had since little. he didn't know how to live without yeonjun, without his intense presence and gentle eyes, without his comforting voice and warm hugs. beomgyu didn't know how he could live without yeonjun when he had always lived for and because of him.

then again, the red haired had said he could do it, said he was strong and wasn't alone, but that didn't mean he actually could. beomgyu was strong, he knew he was, he knew that overcoming all his traumas was hard but he still did it, he knew he was solved with himself and his heart, knew what he wanted and what he loved, but losing yeonjun felt like he was brought years back; mute and numb while secretly begging for help.

beomgyu didn't want to learn how to live without yeonjun, but then again, he wanted way less for the older to live like he was in that moment; empty, lost, scared and agonizing. and added to that, without soobin. the gargoyle didn't think he would've handle it if it was him and taehyun, the weight of trying to kill the love of your life out of insanity and everything that would come with it, in both sides. yeonjun was always the strongest person he knew, but being forced to handle all of that was just cruel.