𝐁𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐞 [COMPLETE]

𝐞𝐬𝐭. 𝟓𝟓 { So This Is Heartbreak }

"𝙸 𝚠𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚠𝚊𝚛 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚖𝚢𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏, 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞."
~~~

𝐙𝐚𝐜𝐡'𝐬 𝐏𝐎𝐕

There has been no contact.

Two weeks, fourteen days, three hundred thirty-six hours, and twenty thousand one hundred sixty minutes since I last felt her hands enclose in mine when she's scared. Two weeks of surveying the halls, thinking her ginger hair will appear among the many brunettes and blondes.

Two weeks of ordering the same Vietnamese food she loved and trying to forget what her comfort felt like in the middle of the night. Two weeks of battling my own mental health and still worrying if she's okay.

And it was driving me absolutely insane.

The more those numbers increased the harder it was to keep my fist from decorating the walls with holes.

I keep convincing myself she'll walk through that door, tell me it was a mistake, and take it all back. Take me back. Or that she would just answer her phone after I've given all the space I could possibly endure. But I know it's not true. None of that will happen and I can't blame anyone but myself.

She thought my football career meant more than her.

It never even came close.

"Jesus, how much shit have you actually consumed over the past three years? Is this all of it?" Miles snaps me out of my daydream. He holds up the last box in his arms as I stare at the half-empty dorm room.

Scanning the bare furniture everything seemed so surreal. The past three years, these past couple of months have been the best and worst moments of my life. And if I could change one thing, it would be to have my girl back.

"Yeah, I'll just check in the rest at the airport," I say, eyeing the two suitcases and overstuffed duffle bag in the corner of my room. The space suddenly becomes larger as my eyes travel across the empty walls and bare furniture.

"Where's your ticket?"

"I haven't—I clear my throat, looking down. His question leaves a bitter taste in my mouth but I bite down the shame and answer anyway. "I haven't bought it yet."

My laptop browser has been set to American Airlines for the past week yet I couldn't muster the courage to purchase the airfare. Not without seeing her.

"Zach, your flight leaves in two days."

"Don't you think I know that!" I raise my voice higher than it's ever been in this house and I curse at myself forgetting that Bria was asleep in the other room. Once I realize what I've done, I sigh rubbing a hand over my closed eyes. "I just—I can't leave without seeing her." I mumble loud enough for him to hear.

Coach Dennis expected me to be in Austin bright and early Sunday morning so I could receive a tour of the football teams' facilities, register for Spring semester courses, and meet the rest of the players before Monday's official practice. Texas U was famous for breeding their players into top fifty NFL recruits. Their program was one of the best in the country and when Coach Benson called me in his office that night to tell me the news, I had completely forgotten I applied into the transfer portal last year after my shit season.