CHAPTER 54

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Valerie's POV
 
Father is refusing to answer all my questions. I gave him enough time before bombarding him with the questions but his aloofness shows how much he doesn't want to talk about it.
 
Now, I am sure he knows something. I am sure he is either hiding something or he wants to protect Ryan's father just because he is my father-in-law.
 
Just like Ryan said, how can we help him if we don't know what they had in the past?
 
I try to touch him to see if I can persuade him once more when the door opens without a knock.
 
I turn to the door to see Mother come in with a huge smile on her face. 
 
"Guess who is here?" She beams in excitement as she stretches her arms toward the ajar door and it reveals Ryan.
 
I don't know if it's from my imagination or if Ryan is really looking upset tonight. His jaws are clenched and he is looking at me with a sort of new gaze that I can't point out.
 
He enters fully and closes the door behind him.
 
I didn't tell him that Father would be discharged today but I guess my mom did. 
 
We haven't been on good terms since the other night too but even with that, he has never looked this mad.
 
Did someone annoy him at the office today? Did he have a bad day at the office?
 
Realizing that I am worrying over him again, I mentally scold myself and glance away from him.
 
I see that Father is staring at him too and then he smiles at him.
 
"How is your health now, dad?" He demands as he approaches, going over to the other side of the bed, and holding his hands.
 
Dad nods. "I feel much better. I haven't been able to thank you for helping me to the hospital…"
 
"What?!" He exclaims loudly, the anger disappearing as he smiles at dad. "It's nothing. If it was someone else, I'm sure that person would have helped too."
 
"Yes, sure", dad answers but it doesn't sound convincing to the ears.
 
Silence falls and mom begins to move to the door to go out.
 
"Val", Ryan calls me as he gets up. When I don't hear the sound of the door opening to show that she is out, I look back to see that she is standing by the door with a curious expression. "Are you spending the night here?"
 
His questions pull me back. I would have loved to say yes to his question but I can't because mom is here.
 
I have been sleeping with dad and My mom at the hospital for days because I wanted to avoid him. I am desperately wishing for the 20 months to be over so we can go our separate ways.
 
But last night, mom pushed me out of the room and asked me to go home to my husband. I went home last night because I had no choice.
 
If I tell him yes, mom will counter me.
 
"I don't know yet", I reply suddenly.
 
Surprisingly, mom isn't saying anything. Instead, she takes the door out.
 
"Can we talk?" He asks, the anger back on his face. "Now!"
 
"Val", Father calls to me and I face him. "You don't need to be worried about me, I am fine already so you should go home."
 
I nod at him, wishing he can figure out why I said 'probably' to Ryan.
 
"Can we talk for a second?" He asks again and I nod, then rise from the chair. He begins to take long strides toward the door and I follow him.
 
When we are out of dad's room, he turns back to face me. "Where is your room?"
 
I gaze up at him, still wondering what could be wrong and why he is this upset. Without pointing to the door, I begin to walk towards it and I hear the sound of his shoe behind me.
 
The door isn't locked so I twist the doorknob and it opens. I enter and stand in the middle of the room with folded arms. Ryan does the same.
 
Silence ensues again as we both watch each other. I search his eyes for clues on what this is about but I get nothing but more angry vibes from him.
 
He is literally fuming in rage.
 
Before I can ask him if he is ok, he dips his hand into his briefcase to produce two pictures which he throws at me and I grab them. When I look down at the first picture, my head suddenly goes blank and my breathing becomes heavy.
 
What the hell! Where the hell did he get pictures of me and Fred kissing? Who the hell did this? Is Ryan monitoring my every movement now?
 
He is already shaking his head by the time I lift my head to meet his gaze.
 
"Who..how did you get this?!" I can't believe I am stuttering. 
 
Won't he think I did this on purpose? Why the hell am I stuttering like a guilty person would?
 
His anger seems to increase because his eyes become red and his knuckles are balled into a fist.
 
"Can you explain this?" He shouts, making me jerk backward in fear.
 
"Explain what?!" I finally get a grip of myself and with heads high, I look him in the eyes.
 
I didn't kiss Fred because I wanted to. He kissed me. The idiot kissed me but this picture shows otherwise.
 
It indicates that we were both kissing each other and we were enjoying it.
 
That damn Fred must be behind this if it isn't Ryan. Why the hell will he do this? What does he stand to gain from this shit?
 
I can never go back to him. 
 
"Explain what?!" He scoffs with a deep frown. "I asked you to explain the reason why you were caught on camera kissing another man when you are with me and you are asking me what you need to explain? Can you even hear yourself out?"
 
"What are you insinuating, Ryan? Just because you see this does not mean it is real or I am cheating…"
 
"If it is not real, then what explanation do you have for this? How can you explain meeting up with your boyfriend when you told me you were going to meet with my mother? You never met with my mother that day and it turned out you were out dining with your ex-boyfriend and he even kissed you '', he says in one breath, cutting me off.
 
Now, I feel guilty. Perhaps, it is because I feel bad. And I can't even say anything else. I can't seem to get this.
 
"Cat got your tongue?" He thunders, making me shut my eyes to calm my nerves.
 
I won't let him shout at me when I am not even going to be married to him for life.
 
"Stop with the shouting already. Are we even real? Why should this bother you? Our marriage will be terminated after 18 more months so you shouldn't bother yourself with chips like this", I raise the picture and his jaws drop open in shock.
 
He has no right to be jealous. What he is doing right now is jealousy. I gave him permission to be with some other girl and he is kicking against me dating when I am not even doing it yet.
 
This is nothing but a setup. 
 
"So you still love him?" He questions and I jerk my head up.
 
"What?! Of course not!"
 
That sounds ridiculous.
 
"Because if you are not still in love with him, you won't act like kissing him when you are married to me is normal. You won't even remind me of the fact that this is just a facade that will be over soon. It shows how irresponsible you are!"
 
"Don't you dare call me irresponsible, Ryan!" I take threatening steps toward him, anger surging through me. "How dare you? How can you believe such rubbish? Just because there is a picture doesn't mean this actually happened. How can you not trust me?"
 
"Trust?" He snarls, turning around in an attempt to calm his nerves. Then he faces me squarely again. "I allowed you to explain yourself, Val. You didn't say anything so don't you dare accuse me of taking things the wrong way. These were the clothes you wore out that day. This was the same day your dad was rushed to the hospital and I called you several times to inform you but you didn't pick up. What do you want me to think, then?"
 
I don't respond. 
 
The last statement hits a spot inside of me
 
I am indeed guilty but he shouldn't win this over. I didn't pick up the calls because I never knew he was calling. I was too engrossed in my obsession to know who that bitch was from Fred to even realize what I was doing.
 
The fact that I didn't even get to satisfy my curiosity that day but ended up getting kissed and framed up like this is pissing me off.
 
If only Ryan didn't ignore me when I asked him who Celina was, this wouldn't be happening.
 
"You know what?" He says. "I guess I was expecting too much from you, Val", hurt crosses his expression but I look away immediately so it won't affect me.
 
I know I did wrong but he ought not to be upset when we aren't even real. Is he like this because I refused to have sex with him and then he is seeing a kissing picture of me and my ex?
 
He ought to be way more mature than Fred. Throwing these tantrums won't help a bit.
 
"I expected way too much from. I thought all you need is space and then we can work things out but from the look of things, you don't want this. This is nothing but a contract marriage! Yes, I get it and I'm sorry I overreacted when we are going to be separated in a few months from now. I'm sorry I am acting like this is real. I promise this will never happen again and you can go date whoever you want, whether your ex or whoever it is you want to date", his breathing has become heavy just like how the intensity of my guilt had intensified.
 
"I am done here!" He strolls to the door before I can think of something to say.
 
Why does sorry seem too heavy for me to say? Why is it so hard for me to admit that this is my fault and not Fred's or Ryan's?
 
I watch him pull the door open aggressively and it reveals Mother's face. She almost falls down but Ryan grabs her before she can fall.
 
She must have been eavesdropping on our conversation. She looks from me to Ryan and from Ryan back to me with her slightly agape mouth, then she screams in disbelief. "A contract marriage?!"
 

****

What will Valerie's mother do? Will she blame Valerie for keeping such information from her? Will she get mad at her for doing such a thing?

Will Ryan still remain mad at Valerie no matter how she tries to explain? Is Valerie doing the right thing by not admitting her wrong?

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