Prey for the Devil's Bloodied Angel Wings

18

^^Hana

Yeira's POV

My head was tilted back as I balanced the tip of the pencil on my tongue. The slamming of the door interrupted my concentration. I groaned as the pencil flopped to the ground. I bent down to grab it, but another hand beat me. I looked up to see a guilty look on Hana's face.

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine, but you could've closed the door a little softer." I grumbled.

"I'm talking about how I reacted yesterday." She squatted and held my hands. "I'm just going through something." She averted her eyes. "Acacia made me painfully aware of it." She mumbled.

"About you not eating?" Her eyes widened at my words. "Is that it?"

"Umm... it's not that I'm not-"

"You're so hungry, so why not eat something? I don't get it." I was frustrated.

"Yei, it's-"

"Jeez! I can hear your tummy rumbling from here. Just stick this in your mouth!" I grabbed a handful of jolly ranchers and stuck it in her mouth. "Eat it like this!" I chomped away.

"You're supposed to suck on them, not chew." She spat them out. "That's really sugary." She made a disgusted face.

"Hana, just listen to your body and eat something. Why don't you eat?! Is it because you think you're fat?!"

"Yeira! Stop it!"

"Just eat something and stop thinking about your body!"

"I CAN'T!" I jumped at her outburst. "Do you know how hard it is to eat when I have flashbacks of my torture! I was whipped and stripped and... they had me piss in a bucket if I was lucky. My feces was next to the rotten food they'd give me. So how can I eat when Everytime I see food, I want to vomit?! Hmm?! How, Yeira?! Tell me!"

"I-"

"I'm mentally broken from my time there! I have nightmares and can't separate my reality. I keep thinking I'm trapped when I'm not. I want some other pain besides the one I'm feeling in my head. I need an escape, Yeira."

"Han-"

"I've contemplated suicide." My jaw dropped at her words. "Acacia has talked me out of it multiple times."

"M-Multiple?" My lip quivered.

"I went and got the tools necessary." Her voice shook. "And I was gonna do it, but... I hesitated." Her teary eyes met mine. "I didn't want to leave you. And then Acacia came and saw. She freaked and disposed of the items. And... I've just been a mess, Yeira."

"I didn't-"

"I've also been cutting myself." She lifted up her long sleeves. My eyes watered at seeing her inner arms riddled with scars.

"You've taken a page from my book." I looked down. "The difference is that I heal faster than you." I looked up at her. "Hana, how can I help you?"

"I've been asking myself the same question. Cia told me to lean on you, but how can I when I don't know what I need? Yeira, I don't want to live anymore."

"Don't say that!" I snapped.

"But, it's the truth." She seemed desperate. "If I didn't have guilt with leaving you, then I'd have ended my life."

"Hana." I whined. "Why?"

"Why?! I'm living in constant fear of her taking me again!"

"I'll protect you."