// MINA //
"I didn't think our day would go like this...I mean, we just got here," Seungcheol chuckled, before carrying me up slowly.
I leaned my head on his chest weakly, clutching onto his shirt as he walked into the bathroom.
"We'll take a bath together, that okay?" He asked, before kissing my cheek.
I nodded my head, before he was placing me down on a little stool. He leaned down to my level, before grabbing my hand.
"Mina...look at me."
I hesitantly looked at him, as I chewed on my bottom lip.
"I'll discipline you if I have to, when you don't listen to me, I'll have no other choice....but I'll never ask for sex without your consent first, I promise....that's something I'll never be able to do again," he said, making me slowly nod.
"What's wrong?"
I shook my head, wetting my lips as I looked away from him.
"He's not dead...Jinyoung....he's in hospital," he had whispered to me between kisses.
"W-What?...Why you did you lie to me then?"
"I was so angry, I just wanted you to believe it so you knew I would kill for you."
"Hey...you okay? Are you hurting anywhere?" He asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.
"No.." I whispered, my eyes trailing around the bathroom.
"Hey...talk to me."
"You're doing it again....being nice a-and looking after me when you'll just hurt me a-again if you don't like what I do," I said, before t eyes finally trailed to his.
"I told you this already—"
"But why, Seungcheol? Why are you messing me up like this? I just want a normal life," I said softly, as I heard the sound of water hitting the bathtub, almost full.
"I'll give you one, just stay with me and don't upset me....and I'll give you the most normal life possible,"
I was about to respond when he carried me up again before softly placing me inside the bathtub.
The water was warm, warm and comfortable.
I was playing with bubbles forming on top when he slid behind me, his arms coming around my waist.
"Was I gentle enough? Before?" He asked, his lips trailing down my shoulder blade.
"Y-Yeah," I mumbled, relaxing into his touch.
"We can...start slow like this....I won't rush you into anything you're still struggling with, I remember too...all the, all the things I did to you....I know it will take much longer to recover from that, but I'm here," he said, struggling to find the right words to say as I smiled weakly.
"I'm getting déjà vu...." I trailed off, as his lips paused on my skin.
"I'm glad Jinyoung isn't dead...but that doesn't mean you really wouldn't have killed him...I saw the look in your eyes that day...you would've done it....and it doesn't change the fact that he's seriously hurt and in hospital," I said, as he sighed into my neck.
"I know....I'm sorry......but I wanted you Mina, I wasn't going to let anyone else have you....but now that I do, I won't hurt anyone, I promise...as long as you stay loyal and faithful to me," he said, his free hand rubbing up and down my arms.
"I know you're upset...confused—"
"Just because I let you...touch me....don't think it changes anything....it'll take time, and that's only because I've come to terms with something," I said, pushing him away from my neck before slightly turning to look at him.
"I'm willing to help you, Seungcheol....to see if the others are really right, if you really are willing to change for me....you can't force me to marry you...because I'll just spend the rest of my life resenting you, and you don't want that....and Jeonghan...I know you're still angry, but taking it out on me will only hurt me...and that will hurt you right?"
"I thought about this a lot last night....if you really just needed to marry someone for more power, you could've faked it with anyone.....but you insist it be me, so I know you still love me."
His eyes bore into mine deeply, as he listened to me quietly without saying a word.
"But I don't love you, and maybe you can change that....maybe I can change with you too...I don't know, but I'll help you," I said, before turning back around when I didn't get a response.
"I do love you, so much," he whispered, before hugging me tightly.
"I was just so angry when I found out you were with another man...it drove me crazy...I didn't know what to do and I reacted badly...I know....and the apartment...I'll never take my name off it Mina, because I know one day you'll love me again, and we'll live there together, happily," he said, as I sighed softly.
"Only if you change Seungcheol. Even after everything that happened in the past two days...I'm still willing to give you a second shot at this....don't do anything to lose my trust anymore, please," I said, as he nodded into my neck.
"But I have rules, Mina....a lot of them, and you need to listen to me...if you promise me to be loyal to them, and be loyal to me... I'll be willing to listen to yours."
it'll take time to change someone as broken as he is...I'll just agree to whatever he says for now
"Okay, I will," I said, before he was kissing my neck again.
"And what about Jeonghan?"
"Don't worry about him for now....I'll look after that," I said.
"Okay....fine."
I felt his fingers run down in between my legs, his face buried into my neck as a chill went down my spine.
"W-What are you doing?" I shuddered, as his hand around my waist tightened.
"I want to feel my fingers inside you again...can I?" He asked softly, as I hesitantly nodded.
Today felt like a dozen emotions, and so much had happened in the lasst 48 hours that at times I was almost certain it was a dream.
Maybe I am playing with something dangerous, maybe this really is a bad idea...after all, Seungcheol had proven far too many times that he was an almost evil, bipolar and a sick individual.
but I was willing to give him a shot at a new life, willing to help him as much as I could
Would I regret this? I didn't know.
Would I regret letting him into my life again? I didn't know that either...
to be continued...
YOU ARE READING
psycho // choi seungcheol
Fanfiction"loving him, giving him my all.... was my first mistake."
