Chapter 91

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TW: Brief mentions of self harm

Madelyn's POV:

Chase was still sleeping like I had told him to. He was really stressed out and his breakdown worried me earlier. I decided to give him some space and time to rest. I put Juliet in the baby carrier and attached it to my chest and put James in the stroller. I stepped out to walk with them. It was getting chilly out since it was December so I walked quickly to break a sweat.

When I got back, it was quiet. I laid the babies down for a nap after changing their diapers and went to me and Chase's room to see if he was still sleeping. I opened the door and noticed that he was laying in the bed, but awake.

"Hi babe." I said quietly.

He turned his head quickly, surprised to see me.

"Hi." I said again.

He rubbed his eyes and smiled. I walked over to the bed and sat down by his legs. I placed my hand on his back and rubbed it gently.

"How are you doing?" I asked.

Chase shrugged.

"Do you want to talk about it more?" I said.

"Not really." Chase whispered.

"Ok." I replied quietly.


He avoided eye contact with me, something he usually did when he was uncomfortable or embarrassed. Even though he didn't want to talk about it more, I decided to reassure him.

"You know you don't have to feel embarrassed or bad about what happened." I said cautiously, reading his facial expressions.

He closed his eyes.

"Hey, look at me." I demanded politely.

Chase slowly opened his eyes and looked at my face, but not my eyes.

"It's normal to feel those things, even though it sucks. I'm sorry you're stressed, and-" I said before Chase interrupted me while shaking his head.

"Maddie..." He said firmly.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Please, I don't want to talk about this right now." He said, sounding defeated.

"We don't have to talk about it, I'm just trying to give you some reassurance." I replied calmly, even though I was frustrated. I was annoyed that he wouldn't open up to me more.

"No, I know, thank you. I'm sorry, I really can't right now. I don't have space in my head." He said.

I nodded. "Well I'm here if you ever want to talk, ok?" 

"Ok." He whispered.

"I love you." I said.

"I love you too." He replied. 

I leaned down and wrapped my arms around him. He reciprocated the hug and we squeezed each other for a minute or two. I had really missed him. I wasn't spending as much time with him lately because of his new show, but I was hoping that we would have more quality time together throughout the holidays and my birthday. 


I gave him a kiss on his cheek. He gently held my chin and pressed his lips onto mine. We kissed for a few minutes and we were both smiling.

"I missed you." He whispered in between kisses.

"I missed you too." I said before his tongue entered my mouth.

"Come here." Chase said breathlessly while taking ahold of my hips. I switched positions so I was now straddling his waist.

I bent down to kiss him again and he ran his fingers through my hair. Chase's hands then traveled to the front of my body and under my shirt. 

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