((CONTINUED VER.)) Starlight and Sunshine: Sun x Moon

Chapter 50: Moving On

Tw: Mentions of suicide/death, swearing

50 CHAPTERS WOOOO!!
It's been over a year since I've started writing this story
It's nowhere near done ._.

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(3rd Person POV)

"Sun answer me!!" Bloody shook Sun a bit harder, turning towards him as fear bubbled up inside of him.

"..Heh-" A wide grin spread across Sun's face, though it looked too wide and there was too much pain behind it to be a good one. "You're joking, right-? This- This has to be some kind of sick joke- Ahah-" Sun started shaking and tears poured out of his eyes, "Tell me you're not serious- You're lying-"

His smile faltered as Bloody shook his head and cupped Sun's face in his hands to gently brush away his tears. He opened his mouth, but he couldn't get any words out, so he just shook his head again to tell Sun he wasn't lying.

"I-" Sun curled in on himself and gripped onto the front of Bloody's shirt as his breath shook, choking out, "I'm gonna fucking kill myself-"
Bloody's eyes widened and he held Sun close, tucking his head under his chin, "No, you're not- Don't do that- Please-" He sounded frantic, scared to lose Sun next.

He rubbed Sun's back and ran his hand over his head to help soothe him, "It's gonna be okay...You'll be okay.." He shushed him gently, letting Sun sob into his chest, "He wouldn't want you to hurt yourself...Moon would want you to be happy; that much I know.."
Sun hiccupped and nodded, letting out a sob that wracked his whole body. "I- I knew this would happen- I knew I was right, but-" He took a deep, shaky breath to keep himself from being reduced to a mess of sobs, "I didn't want it to turn out that I actually was right- I- I was hoping that I was wrong.."

Having already gone through the stages of grief once, Sun was left exhausted and numb--too tired to really grieve and sob over Moon all over again. He just sat there in Bloody's arms, taking deep breaths and trying to calm down. He looked up at Bloody with tears staining his face, heartbroken. "Is there really nothing we can do..? Nothing Ivy can do..?" He whispered.

"Ivy said something about rebuilding him completely, but.." Bloody shook his head and cupped Sun's face in two of his hands, "She said if she did that, his memories couldn't be saved.." He pet Sun's head gently with a third hand, feeling his rays retract and fold back with each stroke. "I'm sorry.." He whispered softly.

Sun sniffled, placing his hands over Bloody's on his face, closing his eyes. "I'm gonna miss him..I do miss him..." Sun's voice broke a tad, "I miss him so much..." He leaned into Bloody's touch, resting his head on his chest, "I'm sorry for snapping and yelling at you...You were just trying to help..I- I was afraid that if I accepted your help, it'd mean that I had to accept that Moon is really gone.."
"Please, don't apologize.." Bloody whispered, "I understand why you wanted to push us all away, and why you were doing those things to distract yourself from the pain.." He tilted Sun's head up to gently press a kiss to his forehead, wiping away his tears, "Nobody blames you for it.."

"Are you talking about my cigarettes-?" Sun gave a sad smile and a chuckle, "I get it; I'll quit it. And...You were right--about Moon, I mean. He really would've wanted me to stop, too..Moon wouldn't have wanted me to end up like this either..." He sighed, "I'll throw my cigarettes out tonight..I promise..." He smiled a bit, though it looked a little forced, "If I don't, then you have my permission to do it for me--no matter how upset I may get, or how much I yell and try to stop you. I need to get rid of this addiction."

Bloody nodded, smiling a tad, "I will, don't worry." He nuzzled Sun's cheek gently, "Now, how about we get you cleaned up, huh? You down for a quick bath?"
"Oh, um-" Sun blushed a tad, "I'm not sure if I'm ready for you to see me like that yet-"
Bloody's face flushed and he quickly shook his head, eyes wide, "Nono-! That's not what I meant-!" He spoke quickly, embarrassed, "I meant that you would go take a bath, and I'd clean up your room while you did-!"

Sun giggled at Bloody's frantic efforts to clear up his intentions. It was the first time he'd genuinely smiled since the whole incident.
"Alright," He hummed, slipping out of Bloody's arms and going to his dresser to get himself some fresh clothes, "I'll go do that."

"Call for me if you need help or anything!" Bloody called after him as he disappeared into the bathroom.

~'-⁂-'~

(Sun's POV)

It's been a week and a half since Bloody got that message from Ivy. I threw out my cigarettes, like I promised. I spent more time outside of my room after closing time with Lunar and Bloody, too.

Bloody says I'm handling things much better than he thought I would, though I'm not so sure. I still miss Moon. I don't think that's ever going to change, either.
I've kept the necklace he gave me. I haven't taken it off since he gave it to me. I wonder if he still has his...Or maybe he got scrapped already..
We haven't gotten any news about Moon's state since Ivy sent Bloody that message. We don't know if he's still in Parts and Services, if he got sent to the S.T.A.F.F Bot Silo, if they're already working on his replacement, or worse.

I shuddered at the thought of someone replacing Moon. It didn't feel right...

Eclipse said something about us being replacements: Moon and I. Actually, he's said a lot about it. It's one of his favorite things to talk about.
Is this how Eclipse feels, then? Or maybe it's more how Lunar must have felt...

Anyway, we've all been coping with Moon's death. Even the Glamrocks got wind of it, and they're upset too. Especially Freddy. He was 'out of service' for a while when he first heard the news.
I got a lot of cards. Plenty of flowers and kind words, too. It seems like everybody is worried about me now, wanting to see how I'm holding up.

I always give them the same response: "I miss him." or "I'm okay." Or something along those lines. The visits were pretty short, since Bloody didn't want me getting overwhelmed or crowded--though I told him that I was fine each time. He's such a sweetheart..

I'm more worried about how the kids will react when they realize that Moon isn't coming back. I've had to keep telling them that he's sick, and that he's been resting and will come back when he feels better. But now, I can't keep up that lie forever.
The littles will most likely not think too much of it; they're too young to understand what dying means..
But the older kids will catch on eventually. Even if we get a replacement for Moon, they might understand that it's not the same person.

I just hope they don't ask too many questions if it happens..

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Short chapter, I know
I'm just tired of the sad stuff T_T

-Still Jackie ;v;