Alone With Ross

•35•

May 20th, 2012

Planes.

Basically giant school buses with wings. To say I am afraid of heights would be an understatement. I'm okay with being up in the air, but I'm just not okay with seeing the earth below me. And with just my luck, I was sitting by the window seat, with a broken blind.

"Can we switch seats?" I asked Ross quietly beside me.

"Uh, sure?" Ross maneuvered himself over me while I smoothly scooted over to the middle seat next to Vi.

"How much longer?" I asked Vi and she looked towards her wristwatch and looked back at her magazine.

"At least an hour."

I sighed and rested my head back against the seat, and I almost screamed when something touched my ear.

"What the hell?" I looked over towards Ross and he touched my ear again this time placing an ear bud in.

"I wanted you to listen to something." He said as he hit play and we both waited as the sounds of an acoustic guitar filled my ear.

Life is about taking chances
Risking those second glances
Balancing my love for you
And all the things you do

Your eyes are like fireflies
You tied the ties between me and you
And now there's nothing I wouldn't do for you.

Hoping there's never a day
When you walk away

I've seen tears in your eyes before
But that wasnt what I was looking for

So please let down your hair
And let go of all your worries and your cares
Just know I'll always be right there

And if in the future you change your mind
Please don't forget the time
When I was yours
And you were mine

I sat there balancing two different emotions, one of them being anger because I didn't want to cry right now, but I was also joyous because I understood the message he put across.

"You should consider a career out of this." I wiped under my eyes and gave Ross his ear bud back.

Ross shook his head. "The music industry is too risky."

I looked at Ross thoughtfully for a second. "What do you want to be?" I asked.

Ross rested his head against the seat and closed his eyes. "My parents always wanted me to become an accountant, but I've always wanted to become a pilot."

I frowned and looked back towards Ross. "Like, flying?" I was so confused because he never expressed an interest for flying before.

"Yeah, my uncle is a pilot and he's shown me a lot of things and its pretty interesting."

I hummed thoughtfully before grabbing Ross' hand tightly because of the turbulence. "Holy shit I hate planes."

Ross winced. "Ow, yeah I noticed."

"How the hell can Mama Vi sleep through this?" I looked to my side to see Mama Vi just resting her head back with my head phones in because she forgot to bring her own.

"She once slept through a tornado storm at the commons house." Ross laughed. "Everyone was already in the basement, and we realized she was gone when we did a head count."

"What are the other houses like?" I asked curiously. I've walked past them before, but I hardly see any of them out.

"Well, there's more drama over there, at least a third of them are on probation. And they're all homeschooled." He listed off and I sat there in silence. "I used to go over there a lot, because the therapist had a melt down so I kinda took over for a couple months. They're really good people, but they hardly get the chance to prove it."

"So how'd you do it? The therapy lessons?" I leaned my head on his shoulder and he intertwined our fingers.

"Well, I already knew a lot from all the sessions I had, but all it is, is just listening. But instead of doing what that prick did, I actually did listen and I made their thoughts valid." Ross shrugged and I rubbed at his arm.

"You're a really good guy. You know that right? And I'm so lucky to have you." I sighed and snuggled into his arm, feeling tired.

"Can I have your journal real quick?" I heard him whisper. I lazily nodded my head and felt him reach into my shoulder bag.

"You read anything else, you're dead." I threatened before closing my eyes and falling asleep.

***
Ross' POV

Dear Caspian,

So right now you're asleep and we're on a plane ride to Canada to go see your mother before she passes. And I just had to let this out now before I explode and you get annoyed with me again.

But you're just so outrageously cute.

And I never thought I would use that word to describe you, but it fits so well now I just can't help it.

You told me that you were lucky to have me.

But little do you know that you are one of the best things to happen to me.

I know I don't open up a lot, but anytime I did I just got hurt in the end. But I love you, and I want to know every part of my past.

When I was younger, me and my brothers and sister had a passion for music. But my parents discouraged it. But I didn't give up.

I performed at every talent show for school, and every birthday party I was invited to. The reason why I was sent to bumpy roads was because of my last fiasco.

It was my sisters high school graduation ceremony, and I spoke to the board of education if I could perform after the Junior choir did.

Well I got approved, so night of the show I briefed my brothers on what I was going to do and I was shunned and belittled by them and they kept telling me that I was being stupid.

So the song I sang was my sisters favorite, Photograph by Nickelback, and I could just picture you laughing now about the terrible music in 2007.

By the time I got to the second verse, the look on my family's face, including Rydel was blood boiling. I didn't even continue I just ran off stage.

I felt so rejected and alienated. I thought I was doing something pretty good for my sister and her graduating class.

But I was only met with a four hour long lecture from my parents, where they questioned what on earth I was thinking, and why I couldn't be more like my brothers and sister.

And that was the day I lost my shit. I told them everything. I explained how I felt like I wasn't accepted for being who I am and that I hate acting like I was someone I wasn't.

Any other parent would have built a better relationship with their child after being revealed to the faults.

But my shit parents, of course had a shit solution.

"You're going to pack your bags tonight. Our family name does not allow such idiotic behavior."

I was told later on by one of my old friends that my parents were telling everyone that I got accepted into some prestigious boarding school.

I didn't though. I got sent to bumpy roads, where I met most of my greatest friends there and my current girlfriend who is drooling on my arm right now.

So, I guess this is the end of my first confession. And by how much weight was lifted off my shoulders I can guarantee I am going to do this again, hopefully next time you're awake for it though.

Love,

R.S.L 5/20/12

••••••••••
I'm sorry for the late update but

MY R5 CONCERT WAS THE BEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME. I WAS SO CLOSE TO THE STAGE.

I was thinking I should just post my whole story about it on wp so you guys could read my whole experience bc it started off SO HECTIC.

so comment here if you want the story of my r5 concert.

I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED THE CHAPTER I LOVE YOU GUYS BYE.