The Beginning: I've Fallen Into His Hands (Gravity Falls Fanfic)

Chapter 45

Eleanor's POV

Bill and I staggered back to his room. He was a lot heavier than he looked. My entire look on things had been thrown into turmoil. I guess I didn't really....hate Bill... I was so confused! I didn't really like him, but I didn't hate him anymore either.

Ok, we'll think about this later. I told myself.

"Think about what later?" Bill murmured.

"Nothing." I replied quickly. "It doesn't matter." At least he was too drunk to put two and two together, that would be so embarrassing.

"Arrow, do you hate me?" Bill broke through a short silence.

"Uh, no..." I said slowly.

"You do!" Bill sniffled over dramatically.

My God, I hope he becomes sober soon... "No. I don't." I exhaled deeply. I was having to practically drag Bill to his room. "You're really heavy, you know that?" I told him.

"I guess the weight of a trillion years can weigh you down..." His voice was low.

I went silent at that and we were finally walking down the hall to his room. "You going to be ok?" I asked him when we about reached the door.

"C-could you stay with me until I'm better." Bill asked with his eyes closed.

I reluctantly gave in and nodded. "Sure."

Bill's eyes were practically shut and he smiled up at me and tried to bring his hand up to brush my cheek as he said, "Thanks babe." He said sleepily.

I cringed away as his hand dropped down from my face. "God, don't call me that." I grumbled. I never thought Bill being drunk would be this annoying. "How many glasses did you have?" I asked as I tried to reach for the handle.

"M-maybe five." He giggled.

I rolled my eyes and laughed. "Of course you did." I threw open the door and helped Bill in who was still unsteady on his legs.

"Thanks for...for helping." He breathed as he made his way to his bed.

"No problem." I replied, smiling slightly. I let go of him as he sat down on his bed. He let his head hang over as he let his eye flutter closed.

Bill flopped down on his bed smiling. "I like your bed better..." He stated dreamily.

"Whatever." I breathed air through my closed lips impatiently.

Bill looked at me and smile fondly. "I'm glad you're here in my castle." He told me. Bill raised his head a little off of the bed. "Do you like it here?"

"Sure." I lied. I would have been totally fine with it if Dipper was here... But he's dead, ok?! I told myself. He's not coming back! I looked down at the floor, realizing that that was right. Dipper was never coming back and I was forcing myself to stay confined in this little box of pain and grief. I had to move on eventually... I looked up at Bill slowly.

A baffled look reached his gaze. "You're crying..."

My hand shot to my face and I wiped the tears away. "I-I was just thinking about stuff. It doesn't matter. I have...have to move past it."

"Move past what?" Bill's voice was steadier now.

"Dipper." I took a deep breath and controlled my emotions. "He's obviously never coming back, so, time for me to get past it and get over him. He's dead and he'll always be dead." I clasped my hands together tightly. "It's not fair for me to wallow in misery forever for something that wasn't my fault..." I closed my eyes, taking deep breaths. It's time to move on...

Bill reached out his hand and I took it and sat down beside him. "I'm sorry about that." He was no longer smiling. "I'm glad you can move on."

I could feel my arms shaking. "Me too..."

"You'll feel better now." Bill continued.

I looked up at him and met his gaze and for the first time, real kindness and care lit them up with a warm glow. "Is this right?" I asked him.

"What?" Bill asked.

"Letting go?" I didn't break the eye contact.

Bill sighed and brushed my hair back. "Of course."

I felt a weight of a thousand problems lift off of me and everything I concealed sprung free. "Good." I grabbed him and pulled him into a kiss.

Bill gasped in surprise and pulled me closer, wrapping his arms around me. It was time to put it all behind me. I ran my hands through his hair and I heard him groan with pleasure. It was like everything I had lie about had been resolved and I was thrown into a pool of pleasure. Bill ran his hands up my back and into my hair.

I took a short moment to breath before pulling him even closer to me and Bill appeared to be growing desperate. I knew he never actually said he liked me sober, but it wasn't that hard to tell. I wrapped my arms around his neck, my feelings soaring.

I finally found self awareness and drew away. My heart was beating rapidly, my blood racing. "Bill, I don't know if I should be doing this."

Bill was breathing hard, happiness and pleasure sparking his gaze. "Why?"

I tried to stand, but he held me in place. "I don't know..." I broke away from his gaze. "I-I'm going to go back to my room." I stood up and walked towards his door.

"Bye, Arrow..." He called breathlessly.

"Bye Bill..." I closed the door and walked out confused.

Omg, I was nervous about writing and posting this chapter... What did yah think O//u//O