One hundred and thirty-six

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I wake up the next morning to Micah crying. My eyes fly open and I sit straight up and look around.

"She's fine babe" Robert says from beside me I notice large bags under his eyes. He mustn't have slept last night.

"Where is she?" I frown looking around. I notice a nurse holding her.

"Just checking her honey. She's fine. But it's time to start breast feeding" the same middle aged woman that was with me when I gave birth smiles at me.

"Ok" I smile.

She gives me another smile then walks over to me and places Micah in my arms.

I slide the nightie off me, exposing my breast. I cradle Micah's head and position her against my breast.

It takes a few attempts but she finally latches on and starts to suck. I smile as I watch her feed.

"Great job honey" she smiles, "she's all clear and you can go home by this afternoon" she adds.

"Thank you. Is there anything we have to sign?" Robert asks.

"Yes forms and things. You can do them now if you want" she says.

Robert looks at me and I nod my head yes. He gives me a kiss on my cheek then follows the nurse out.

I continue cradling Micah as she feeds when the door opens. Looking up, I see Cole walk through.

"Cole!" I grin widely.

"Hey Victoria" he smiles as he walks over to me, "I see she's feeding alright" he adds watching Micah.

Just then she stops and tilts her head away, "yeah, um Cole what do I do now?" I ask.

"You have to burp her. Place her up against your chest with her chin resting against your shoulder" he smiles.

I follow his orders and burp her once I'm done, I cradle her to my chest again Cole slides the nightie up so my breast is covered.

"What did you name her" he asks.

"Micah Liana. After Michael and mum and Antony" I smile.

"You named her after Michael" he asks in shock.

"Yes. I know you wanted to name Emily after him. Is that ok?" I ask.

"Of course. Thank you so much Victoria" he smiles with tears in his eyes.

"Do you want to hold her?" I ask.

Cole doesn't say anything just looks down and watches her. Micah looks over at him as well.

"Yes" he says nodding his head.

I place her in his arms and Cole holds her closely as he looks into her eyes. We sit in silence as he holds her.

"She looks just like you" I whisper close to tears.

Cole looks up at me the tears in his eyes are starting to slide down his cheeks. We continue looking at each other with tears until Emily runs through the door.

We quickly wipe our tears away and look at her. She doesn't notice mine and Cole's tears as she runs up to the bed.

When she sees Micah her eyes widen and she grins. Cole picks up and place her on the bed.

"Meet your little sister Micah" I smile at her.

"She's beautiful mummy! Can I hold her!" she grins excitedly.

"Of course honey" I smile.

"Sit back and open your arms" Cole tells her.

Emily does what he says and then he places Micah in her waiting arms. Emily giggles then leans down and kisses her.

"I'm your big sister Micah! I'm going to love you forever. And we are going to be best friends! Im going to help mummy dress you and feed you. When you get bigger I'm going to do your hair and talk to you and love you forever and ever because you're my little sister. I'm going to always be there for you and protect you and if anyone hurts you I will get Drake to bash em' up. Drake is your big brother in law. So is Liam and Juliet will be your best friend too. But we are the closest and no one will ever come between us little sister" Emily whispers to her.

I watch in pure admiration. I look up expecting Cole to have the same look but his face is filled with pain.

He looks up and catches me staring, "we have to go Emily" he says gently.

He picks up Micah and places her in my arms, then picks up Emily. Before I can say anything he leaves without a look back.

Just before he disappears out the door I catch Emily's eyes as she looks at me from over Cole's shoulder. Her lip quivers then she's gone from view.

"Cole? Bring her back here!" I yell startling Micah as she starts to cry.

"I'm sorry baby" I frown as I cradle her to my chest and calm her as Robert walks in.

"What's wrong?" he frowns taking Micah.

"Cole was here with Emily. She was holding Micah and talking to her and then he picked Emily up and walked off with her before I could say goodbye" I say my eyes filling with fresh tears.

So help me god if he takes Emily away from me I march over to his house and whack him. I'm not pregnant anymore so I can punch him and don't have to worry about my stress levels as much.

"Up to your feet. We have to bath Micah and change her. Then the family will be here then we can go home" he says changing the topic.

I wipe my tears and look at him. I nod my head yes and get out off bed. As much as I love Emily, I have to focus on Micah now.

After showing the midwives I know what I'm doing and know how to bath and change her. They finally give Robert and I the all clear to leave.

Mum, dad and Antony arrived shortly after Cole left and I haven't had the chance to fill mum and Antony in.

They looked after Micah for us, so Robert got some rest and I had a long bath. My body is still aching but the nurses said it will pass in a few days.

At the moment I'm waiting with mum and Antony as dad and Robert figure out how to put the baby seat into the car properly because the hospital won't let us leave until they've checked it.

"Cole came here with Emily earlier" I say.

Both look up from looking at Micah who's in mum's arms sleeping and look at me.

"And?" Antony says.

I tell them what happened and somehow managed to not burst into tears.

"You need to give him time sweetheart. Put yourself in his shoes, this must be so hard for him" mum says gently.

"It's hard for me too mum! When Micah was inside me to was so easy to pretend. Now she is out and I'm holding her in my arms, I don't want to pretend anymore" I say as I release my tears I've been holding.

"She looks exactly like her daddy. I can't do this anymore" I add.

Antony walks up to me and wraps his arms around me. I have a complete meltdown in his arms.

"You need to decide what you're going to do Victoria and you need to decide very soon. This isn't just about you. It's about Micah, Cole and Robert. All their lives are tied up in this and you can't keep dragging it out" mum says.

"I know mum. I have to chose between Robert and Cole" I sigh finally accepting it.

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Author's Note

Ok my beautiful readers. Last time I'm going to ask this.

Robert or Cole.

You've had months to decide who you like better. I think you know them both better now and know their backgrounds, why they act like they do, know more about their personalities and characteristics.

Past decisions where solely based on who would be better for Tori but now Micah is here, who is best suited to be her father?

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