Dare Trilogy | Book 3 Editing | ✓

3.1.5 | Shadows of Past

Posted: July 7th, 2017 | Edited: October 29th, 2019

| . . . C H A P T E R - 3 . 1 . 5 : S H A D O W S - O F - P A S T . . . |

Throughout the day, it had been hard for me to not look at Khushi. Yesterday, everything I was hiding from her had come out in the open. It had been a highly emotional night, and yet a huge burden had lifted my shoulders. As disturbing as the reality of our past and present had been, I felt that much closer to her. It was something else entirely to not have to hide such a major part of our past from her. When I had learned the same people who had hurt my sister were responsible for her undoing, I had felt a rush of conflicting emotions. But, most of all: guilt. If only I had made sure they wouldn't be able to hurt anyone other than Anjali, then none of this would have happened to Khushi.

But... I recalled the conversation I had with Anjali the night before, just after Khushi had learned about Shyam, Anjali and Aarav. Anjali had said after I had told her I blamed myself, "Think of it like this, Arnav. You got a chance to meet Khushi because of our past."

I had countered that I would have preferred to meet Khushi under different circumstances. But even I had been forced to acknowledge the idea. The situation under which we met may not be ideal, but what if we had never met? Yeah, I don't like that alternative. I don't think I could have loved anyone the way I love Khushi.

Despite all the darkness she faces, I still see a light in her that draws me towards her. For me, she is that one example that humans aren't perfect and they do make mistakes. And, she is one who after making them, when she does come to realize, she works to amend them. She doesn't let her pride stand in the way of doing the right thing – no matter how difficult it proves to be for her.

And today... after waking up and feeling as if we were given a clean slate to start over, all my inhibitions when around her disappeared. I wasn't holding back around her, physically or emotionally. The first few times while baking when I realized, I had panicked slightly thinking it wasn't the best idea to breach her personal space. But it had amazed me how well she handled it. Perhaps, what she had said earlier once was right. Her body may stiffen first at an unexpected closeness, but once given the time to get used to it, she is nothing short of a miracle.

Khushi snapped her fingers in front of my face, for I had once again dazed off admiring her. "So, can I have cake now?"

"You won't get mad at me?" I asked, recalling the decoration.

"Why would I?" She asked back.

I got up and walked in the kitchen to get it. After placing it on the dining table, I replied. "Because of this."

Khushi got on her feet to read what was written on the cake. It read 'Happy Birthday, sweet pea'. I tried to make it as legible as possible, but let's not get too critical here. I am no cake decorator. I don't claim to have good handwriting either.

She was just staring at it, making me nervous before turning to glance up in my direction. It was her birthday today, and she never explicitly told me it was today, but I had learnt during college times from Riddhima. I had never wished her, because then she'd want to know how I knew and back then, she wasn't aware that I knew Riddhima and Armaan from before.

This may as well be the first birthday of hers we were celebrating together.

She sighed, sitting back down, expressing the reason she didn't announce this day to others. "I don't like celebrating it."

I answered reaching for the knife, "Which is why we aren't. We can cut the cake though, can't we?"

There is a flaw in my argument. I know. Cutting the cake is still a form of celebrating. Hopefully, she won't focus too much on it.