Behind The Stage (BxB)

Chapter 29-Not Supposed To Be True

Chapter 29
Not Supposed To Be True

Lucien POV

So, here I am walking down these stairs inside of a chateau and by the side of Alexei Portwin as his boyfriend.

He's quietly encouraging me with telling me to be myself and that he's proud of me, and that I should try and relax.

Hah! If I relax too much, I'll make a fool of myself. I have to be in control of myself.

The reporters and cameras are here until the end of mayor Ezekiel Portwin's Thanksgiving speech.

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The room starts to spin and I can feel people's eyes on me. I try to ignore and pass the panic attack by holding onto Alexei's hand and looking down to not see all the people and cameras, but when I look down I still see the shoes and legs of people. I feel claustrophobic.

Forced to do so, I tug at Alexei's sleeve and whisper I'm going to be sick. He doesn't hesitate after seeing my state and pulls me after him to the nearest bathroom.

I throw up as soon as I get to the toilet, mortified that Alexei sees this but at the moment my focus stays on throwing up.

When I'm done, I feel sweaty and I'm shaking but manage to drink the cup of water Alexei hands me. I don't feel any better though, my mind goes odd again.

I can hear faintly Alexei's voice calling my name and taking both my hands into his and soon he grabs my face to look me in the eye, but my body isn't listening and just continues to hyperventilate.

My hands grab my throat as my eyes dilate because I can barely breathe, and suddenly I feel light as Alexei scoops me in his arms and carries me...out of the bathroom and away by the noises getting farther away.

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"He's been like that for almost half an hour, Alexei, he's too weak for this life" a rough male voice speaks and my anxiety is rising again until I hear Alexei's voice next, he's here too so I'm safe.

"He is not weak, he just had a panic attack and actually for your information, he's much stronger than even I think he is" Alexei says so firmly that I need to suppress my blush because that would reveal me eavesdropping on them. Oh god, that is what I have lowered myself into doing! "It's been a tough day on him, father, give him a break. He is my boyfriend and you just have to get used to it."

Father. His father. Father?! Way to go with an excellent first impression on your boyfriend's father and the highest man in the city you're in, Lucien!

"Your mother and I have been waiting for you to settle down, and now you have but with a boy" Mr. Portwin says and huffs. "Alright, fine, we won't pressure you any longer to find yourself a relationship, but for heavens sake, stop bringing an innocent boy into your rebellion against us."

"No, no, stop with that bullshit" Alexei snaps and I can feel the air tense and even myself. "I apologize, I...I don't know, father, but I really do like him. He's...intriguing. He's good looking. Yes, he's also confusing me because of how androgynous he looks but he's a good person and I find myself liking him more every day. I don't honestly know yet why, I haven't found any other guy attractive before and a boy nonetheless. But he's a good person to be by my side, so I won't break up with him. I brought him here for a reason, and I trust him. You will still see it yourself when you give him a chance."

Damn to hell with you, Alexei Portwin, you're not allowed to make me blush when I'm pretending to be still asleep!

And with such lies, he's just saying all that crap to convince his parents we're together! What a smooth sweet talker.

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"I-I'm o-okay" I say quietly, and he visibly relaxes. I decide to not give a damn. "W-what is so s-special a-about my b-birth m-month?"

Alexei's face hardens and I regret for ever speaking. "What, so, you heard all that, didn't you?" I nod sheepishly, which causes Danica to giggle. "How long have you been awake?"

"Since it w-was m-mentioned I've b-been out for a-almost h-half an hour" I admit, and he looks like thinking about something until...oh my god!

Alexei Portwin blushes! Just a hint of a blush though but one nonetheless. I find it so cute and mesmerizing that both of our eyes lock to look at another's...until he breaks it.

"Awesome" he says scratching the back of his neck, and then bolts out of the room before I can blink.

That jerk left me alone with his parents, both of them and to meet his father alone. I blush and try to sink into the plush couch, but end up sitting up because I don't want to seem any less pathetic in front of these people.

"You have to pardon him, he acts like a ridiculous brat too much for his age" Mr. Portwin says after clearing his throat. I nod, fidgeting with the cuffs of my button up shirt. I miss my hoodies. "You made my son and yourself miss my Thanksgiving speech, the highlight of this event. Are you feeling better?"

"Come on, this wasn't Lucien's fault and there is no damage done by them missing one of your speeches" Danica scolds her husband amused and then smiles at me. "But so, dear, are you feeling any better?"

"Yes, I-I am, t-thank y-you. I'm s-sorry I h-have g-given a t-terrible impression of me to b-both of you, b-but -"

Danica shakes her head and waves her finger at me as she cuts me off with a bright smile. "Nonsense, you're doing just amazing. Now that you're alright, Ezekiel and I need to attend the party again, but I would like to continue our conversation of earlier with you knowingly present tomorrow. You need to know more and so do we. I'll get Alexei come back here with you until you're good to join us."

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I actually start to fall asleep again, but Alexei's quiet, low voice suddenly makes my heart beat almost out of my chest. I'm literally scared of my heart and think it can jump up my throat.

"It's not supposed to be true, it was easy to not believe it and just ignore it. There's no soulmates, people aren't destined together but fall in love with each other and work on their relationship and so on how it works. I can't have a soulmate or whatever, okay, I can't make anybody happy. At least not you, I have already hurt you. You deserve somebody who adores and loves you for you and is attracted to you like in an 'oh my god, I'm with Lucien' kind of way."

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