Angelo Caduto - Fallen Angel (SpaMano - Gakuen!AU) (discontinued)

Chapter 15

-- WARNING: Suicide attempt in this chapter. Please be aware of that if you are sensitive around these topic. --

--

9:29 PM

--

Making sure that nobody was following me, I made my escape through the window, and quickly boarded a train to my town.

I slammed the front door of my apartment shut, breathing heavily. Right now, I was going to make everything easier for everyone. It was all going to end here.

Tears ran down my cheeks, and I slumped down, shaking.

As if I were being possessed, I opened the drawer without hesitation, and pulled out a kitchen knife.

I made three cuts – one on my left arm, two on my right.

Wincing in pain, I walked into my room, and locked the door.

For a previous class project, Antonio and I had bought some rope, and there were still some leftover.

But...wouldn't hanging myself shock everyone? They'd see my body just hanging there...wouldn't that be too...

No matter, dammit. I've locked the door of the apartment, anyway. Nobody's bound to find me.

As soon as I had wound the rope into a noose, I hung it on something above my door, and stepped up on the chair.

I'm going to assume that my face was blank as hell. But that doesn't matter, either.

I'm going to die today.

At my own hands.

I kicked down the chair, then realized in horror what I had done wrong.

I was supposed to jump, so that my neck would immediately snap, and it would be a quick death.

Instead, I merely just kicked the chair.

But someone like me deserves to die a slow and painful death, right?

...It hurts.

The rope tugged against my neck, and I struggled to breathe.

I thought of all the bad things that had happened in my life – from the war to the potato bastard taking away my brother for himself.

I would never have to think about those things again.

You would think that I would end up being reborn again in the Underworld, but being a half-blood demon, they would burn my soul.

I'd never have to see the potato bastard and all those horrible people ever again. I wouldn't have to be verbally and physically abused by my relatives.

I'd never see any of them again.

I'd never see my little brothers, calling out my name and asking if they could help me cook dinner.

I'd never hear Clarisse screaming at me ever again. Or laughing, for that matter.

I'd never hear the sound of Antonio's laugh or see his smile ever again.

And even if he never found my body in here, he'd eventually find out.

And I can't bear to think about the pain he would be going through then.

I was only thinking about my own life.

I didn't think about how it would affect those around me if I died.

I'm so fucking...selfish!!

I...

I

I