Olivia is ready to give up on relationships at this point but Shayne won't let her
Olivia:
"Tell me you are not where I think you are" Shayne's voice echoes out from the speaker of my phone.
I smile sheepishly, noting my surroundings. The wall of kennels, filled with dogs of various ages and colors look back at me. The one in the middle, labelled 'Hank', a black lab with white markings and long fur, turns over on his back exposing a large white belly. My heart explodes at the cuteness.
"Fine, I won't tell you" I reply blithely.
This is my happy place, the dog adoption center at the local pet store. It's where I come when the world is falling apart. Unfortunately, somebody doesn't exactly approve. But today is the day. I'm going to do it. I'm getting a dog and there's nothing Shayne can say to convince me otherwise. I hear a sigh on the other end of the line,
"Olivia..." He said.
"Nope, I have no time for reasonable arguments, I just want to fill the emptiness of my life with unconditional love, I think I'll name him Pablo Escobar...or Randy I haven't decided yet, it depends on how cute he is" I steamroll over his protest, looking back at the selection of furballs.
"Resist the call of the dog, you don't need one" He repeats in a clear and decisive tone.
I resist the urge to scoff.
"I think I do, I've given up, I'm going to live out the rest of my sad spinster years in sweatpants and surrounded by dogs and I'll laugh at all of their quirky high jinks! Every single one!" I said.
"One bad relationship does not mean you'll be alone forever" Shayne states.
"I won't be alone, I'll have Goose...that's a good name right? I'll tell him I love him constantly, and he'll bark back that he knows, It's perfect and it wasn't just one bad relationship, It was a lot of bad relationships" I said.
Shayne groans so loudly I have to pull the phone away from my ear.
"Have you considered therapy?" He asked.
"Have you considered that the entire male population is terrible?" I jab back.
I ignore his yelp of anger and continue my rant.
"No offense Shayne, but I've been a witness to all your doomed relationships, you're my best friend, but you're the worst when women are involved" I said.
"The worst? Girls know exactly what they're getting when they go home with me, we enjoy each other and then go our separate ways, I never lie to them and promise a future, It's just sex" He said.
"And that's the problem most men have, they want the sexy nympho to come over, screw their brains out, and leave the next morning" I replied.
I ignore the scathing glance of the elderly lady picking up a bag of food in the adjacent aisle. An older gentleman joins her and her face just lights up, and I just want to cry. Now I'm jealous of disapproving old ladies. What next? A love of smooth jazz? They join hands and continue moving at a glacial pace away from me, matching orthopaedic shoes squeaking on the linoleum. So. Freaking. Cute. I turn back to the dogs before continuing.
