THE Naive ME

Part 10

Katleho

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He is not a man with much words.. he is just sitting here focused on his plate...its been 30 minutes of being on this restaurant ..the conversation doesn't last us even two minutes I love talking a lot but with this one, I'm running out of the words. I really wanna get out of this place...

So do you have someone in your life..he said, dear Lord now we are making a process

Katleho: No (with that he shift his focus from the plate straight to my eyes I'm nervous)
Joseph: how?
Katleho: How umh well what do you mean how?
Joseph: how comes a beautiful lady with fine personalities like you be single?
Katleho: (he said am beautiful wow ) Well maybe people think I'm too perfect to be single( he look at me with i'm not convinced eyes)...ok maybe its because love is not meant for me
Joseph: why you say so?
Katleho: It always leaves me with heartbreaks actually I don't do love anymore( he paused for a minute after my statement)
Joseph: If you don't do love then why are you here?
Katleho: You invited me in remember( is he crazy how can he ask me that question)
Joseph: I invited you I know but you wanna tell me that it never crossed your mind that I might have intentions of love with you?
Katleho: ( ooh ok um how do one answer this one) Umh well am just trying my luck(i feel stupid now)
Joseph: Trying your luck?
Katleho: You stated something about the intentions of love ...what if you are different from them
Joseph: You believe they are those types of guys who are different?
Katleho: Yeah I believe just that I never said yes to the right guy
Joseph: It makes sense

That's how we closed the topic he never said he loves me that not cool...he received a phone call so he had to drop me at home he said something about business opportunities around Polokwane that he should attend. I just felt like this will be me in a few years. I should stick with him he will upgrade me .. I just received a kiss on my cheek and he told me he will call me before he goes to sleep. Now I wonder if he is avoiding me..does he even love me..maybe he takes things one step at the time. but something is missing he is not Germain .. I just feel like Germain he is the missing part...i never heard from him I miss his company...later on he called he wants me to spend my day tomorrow with him indoors..he is inviting me to his house... I told him I don't think it's a good idea he told me I should trust him ..but do I trust him?. I don't know if I should go or not but I don't feel good about it. I feel like I might lose control over the situation while I don't even know what to call what is going on..sleeping with him I will feel cheap even him I bet I will seem like someone who is easy to open up for every guy .. I don't wanna be seen that way cause that's not who I am...this are the things that run in my thoughts..maybe I'm just overthinking you said you trying your luck why don't you just go with the flow...