A Soldier's Girl

Chapter 37:

Chapter 37:

Beth's View

Waking up on top of Daryl at the base of the stairs, I feel not only sore, but wonderful. We never had sex like that and it was exciting and random. I guess that's what I like now. When we try for a baby it's so old hat and predictable, but this afternoon was not predictable or old hat. It was new and exciting, more than satisfying.

"Hello..." Daryl says and squeezes my ass in his hands as he kisses my lips.

"Hi..." I kiss back and he just kisses me down my neck. There's something about him that just gets me going. I think it's how lovey dovey he is before and after sex.

"How's my cutie pie?" I crinkle my nose at that and he frowns. "What?"

"That was forced..." I sit up on him and he looks at me with hollow eyes.

"No it wasn't...I meant it." He looks up at me and has his hands on my hips.

"It jus felt like you were searching for something new..."

"Beth, are we really having this conversation? I jus called you cutie pie...what's wrong with that?"

"Nothing...if you mean it." He stands up forcing me to the stairs. Rubbing his hands through his hair, he rubs his face and paces the floor.

"Beth, what's up with you lately? First you want a baby and everything and when we start trying you start getting...snappy. And now yer questioning my feelings the way I talk to you? I jus don't get it." He continues to pace and I just tuck my knees to my chest and hold my hands.

"I'm sorry, I jus don't feel it when you automatically jump to some pet name we've never used before...it feels like her jus passing time."

"So what? You want me to just not talk to you now, Huh? Just fuck and go?" He's becoming irritated and I can't blame him, but he doesn't need to take up an attitude with me.

"Listen, I'm jus telling you what's what....that came out wrong." I rush to his side to grab his arm and he pulls it from me.

"Nah, ya clearly meant it. Well I gave you yer fuck. I guess now is where I go." Pulling on his pants, he tugs on his shirt and boots and before I can say anything, he's out the door and gone in his truck. Sitting back on the stairs I feel useless. We haven't been communicating perfectly as usual lately. We've been arguing and fighting...but today is worse somehow. Grabbing my clothes I head upstairs an take a bubble bath. I just need to relax and forget about yet another fight with Daryl. Why is this becoming us? Fighting, not talking, just sex? Were we really losing each other cause I want a baby? We? We want a baby. Right? I'm not even sure any more. We seemed happier when it was just Daryl and I and the dogs.

Maybe I should just call it off. Not have a baby and just go back to our old life that seemed perfect. At least I was happy with him back then.

I end up falling asleep in the tub and wake up around midnight. Draining the tub, I get dressed and step out of the bathroom. Daryl's not in the bedroom, so I head down stairs, but he's not in the living room or kitchen. He's not even in the game room down stairs or out by the gazebo and pond. Looking in the driveway, he's still not back. I must have made him really really mad. Taking my phone, I try to call him, but he doesn't pick up. So I call Merle instead.

"Lo?"

"Merle, it's Beth...sorry I'm calling so late."

"Nah, it's fine. Everything okay?"

"Yeah...um have you heard from Daryl? We got in an argument and he still isn't back."

"Nah, ain't heard from him since Tuesday."

"If you hear anything, will ya let me know?"

"Yeah course."

"Thanks Merle..."

"No problem sweetie...goodnight." I hang up and sit on the couch. I sit here all night and worry about Daryl. I sit until I can't feel my eyelids anymore and I pass out around 4:56 in the morning.

Waking up, I look at the wall clock and it's 12:39. I get up and check the driveway, but still no Daryl. Rubbing my face I make coffee and take care of the dogs. Koda is now able to walk around and he's started to learn to bark, which Moose seems to ignore. I try calling Daryl again, but I still don't get an answer.

Where on earth could he be? Did he just skip town and leave me here forever? Did he go back to Syria just to prove a point? I just wish he were here so maybe we could talk this out...if he were willing to listen.

I can't get passed this whole leaving thing though. I just feel like maybe I really pressed the wrong button, okay I did press the wrong button.

Getting in my truck, I drive around town and then out to my Dad's house to check there, but they haven't seen him.

"Maybe he just wants to be alone, Beth. I mean, you really upset him,bits obvious. Just give him some time." Maggie rolls some cookie dough into balls and puts them on a tray.

"I get he wants space, but two days without even picking up to yell at me? I think that's a lil unreasonable."

"Maybe he doesn't wanna yell. Maybe he just wants you to get the message."

"What message Maggie? That he doesn't wanna be with me any more? That he doesn't want kids? That I'm out of my fucking mind trying to make all this worse?" I pound my hand into the counter and. She just glares at me.

"Maybe the message is that yer too uptight and have a stick up yer ass am that isn't meant to be there." She glowers and I roll my eyes.

"If he has a problem, why can't he just say it?"

"Because he's yer best friend and doesn't want to hurt you....but he sucks at it."

"This is shit...fine! If he doesn't wanna come home, let him! What the fuck do I care for?"

"Yer jumping the gun on this...I'm sure of it."

"What do you know?" I grab my purse and leave Maggie's house and head home. When I get there, surprise surprise...he's still not home.

Fine, let him go off and do what he wants. Who need him?