Stucky oneshots

Guilty Nightmares

"Bucky?" Steve mumbled in his sleep, rolling over restlessly and accidentally hitting Bucky in the head.

Bucky woke up slightly, aware that Steve said his name and hit him. He looked at his husband, who appeared to be okay and still sleeping, before closing his eyes again.

A few minutes later, Bucky was woken up again. This time, Steve was louder.

"No!...Buck." He called out, rolling onto his back. Bucky studied him closely: his breathing was a little fast and he was sweating. Bucky laid his hand on Steve's chest and spoke softly, "Stevie, you're okay. I'm right here with you. It's just a dream."

Steve seemed to relax a bit at the words, rolling back onto his side facing Bucky. They slept peacefully for awhile more until Steve started screaming.

"No! Bucky! Bucky! I'm sorry!" He was writhing around in bed, tears streaming down his cheeks.

Bucky woke up and immediately tried to wake Steve up. It hurt him to see his husband clearly in agony.

"Steve, it's just a dream. Wake up, doll. Please, come on. You're safe, I'm right here with you." He tried, holding his flailing body still.

Steve's eyes shot open and he gasped, panting as if he had been running for hours. His eyes met Bucky's and he crumbled, sobs overtaking him. "I-...'m sorry!" He wailed, turning away from Bucky and burying his face in his pillow.

Bucky didn't like that; Steve wasn't usually the one to shut down when he was upset, he typically talked about it and seeked out comfort.

"Steve? Doll, what's wrong?" He asked, nervous to make him any more upset, even though that seemed impossible with the uncontrollable sobs that were wracking his body. He laid a hand on his shoulder but retracted it when Steve nearly flung himself out of bed at the contact.

"Steve, please talk to me. Don't shut down." He begged, not sure what else to do. Normally Steve didn't do this. If he was upset, he usually wanted Bucky to hold him and comfort him. Now Bucky was lost.

"No! I....I didn't...." he made out, leaving Bucky still confused. This wasn't okay and Steve's crying only seemed to intensify.

"Baby, you're going to hyperventilate and make yourself sick. Please just breathe. Remember how you always tell me to? In and out, sweetheart, just breathe." He coached.

Steve didn't listen, though. He continued to cry inconsolably and Bucky was almost as much of a wreck as he was now.

"Steve, please, let me help you." He begged, trying for contact once more only for Steve to pull away again.

"Did I do something wrong?" Bucky asked quietly, almost afraid of the answer even though he couldn't think of anything that would've caused this.

Steve shook his head 'no.' Progress.

"Did you have a nightmare?" Yes.

"Was it about me?" Another yes.

Bucky's heart seemed to clench. He indirectly caused this. "Was it...the Winter Soldier?"

Surprisingly, that was a no. Bucky felt himself relax, even though he didn't remember tensing up at the question he had asked.

"Was it during the war?" He tried, receiving another nod. Then Bucky realized what it was. Steve tortured himself with blame for years and nothing had ever been able to convince him it wasn't his fault.

"Steve, the train was not your fault." He spoke firmly, not a doubt left that him falling from the train was what plagued Steve's dreams.

Steve took his face out of the pillow and faced Bucky. He looked a mess and it broke Bucky's heart even more. "Yes it was!"

"No, it was not. You didn't want it to happen, you didn't cause it to happen, you didn't push me, you didn't set out with the intention for me to fall. Therefore it cannot be your fault." He assured him, holding his arms out for Steve to initiate contact when he was ready.

"It's still my fault! I'm sorry!" He cried, finally allowing contact as he collapsed into Bucky's arms.

Bucky held him in a tight hug, rocking back and forth slightly with his cheek against the top of Steve's head. "Shh, it's not your fault. You have nothing to be sorry for, my love. It's okay, I'm safe. I'm okay. You're not at fault. Nobody blames you, I don't blame you. Everything's okay." He whispered as Steve clung onto him.

"I'm sorry....I'm sorry." He kept repeating apologies through sobs, very slowly beginning to calm down. Bucky continued to reassure him and do his best to comfort him, rocking back and forth and rubbing his back.

For nearly an hour, they stayed like that until Steve's wailing and sobbing turned to sniffles and occasional hiccups.

Bucky looked down at him and gave him a smile, wiping the tears off his cheeks with his flesh hand. Wordlessly, he laid them both back down and kept Steve in his arms.

Steve sniffled once more and buried his face in the crook of Bucky's neck. "Sorry." He murmured quietly.

"You don't have anything to be sorry for, doll." He kissed Steve's temple.