Infinity

chapter 16

Eddie's POV

I was sitting at my worktable in my lab staring at the new letter that I had just received to my office. For the past two months I have received a new letter every few days, but this was the first one I've received at my office.

Marleena,

            At this point I don't even know if you are reading these, but I will continue to send them. You deserve to know that I care for you and that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. I never realized how much you meant to me until you had already left and cut all ties. At first, I was angry that you left. I thought you were being selfish, but I was wrong. Those thoughts were just me repeating father's words. I never should have tried to gain his approval and I am sorry that we were never close because of it. You were always the strongest one of the family. You saw right through his arrogance, and you fought back and took control of your life. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for the part I played, for not standing up for you, and for not being there for you. Can you ever forgive me?

After you left it took a while, but I eventually also left. I stood by your example and pursued my passions. I am now the manager at the largest bank in Boston and I love it. None of this would have been possible if you did not have the courage to stand up to him. Mother is doing good but still refuses to leave father. Honestly, I think she is scared to. She has spent so much of her life being controlled by him that she does not know how to leave. I have tried telling her that we would be there to help, but she just refuses. Well, this letter is getting long now so I better wrap it up. I hope you are well, and I understand if you never respond. I just want you to know that I am sorry and that I am here if you ever need me.

Much Love,

Jasper M. Edwards

I set the letter down with the others and placed my head in my hands. I had no idea what to do. I loved my twin, and I was glad to hear from him, but I thought I was done with my family. But here he comes bringing it all back up. I was still sitting in this position when Howie entered my lab.

"You alright?" I took my hands from my face and looked into Howie's concerned face. "Did you get another letter?"

I just nod. I had told Howie and Peggy about the letters two weeks ago. "Have you decided what to do?"

I just groan and place my head back in my hands. "No, I have no idea what to do Howie. I've already been hurt so much by my family; how can I be sure I won't be again?"

He just sighed and pulled up a second chair to my worktable. "You can't Eddie, that's the risk you run letting others close to you. Eventually the people closest to you will hurt you, but its up to you to decide if what you get in return will out way the risk. Nothing good never comes without risk."

I sit and contemplate Howie's words. He is right. I've been deeply hurt by the people closest to me all my life and it has made me afraid of relationships and the risk of being vulnerable. Even with Howie and Peggy I've struggled to be vulnerable. Is a potential relationship with my twin worth the risk of being hurt by him again? The answer terrifies me.

Three Months Later

It took a while, but I eventually responded to my brother's letter, which I quickly received a reply to. We have been communicating via letters on a weekly basis for the past seven weeks and today he is coming for a visit. Peggy is spending this Sunday afternoon with Daniel to give me and Jasper some time, which is how I ended up home alone waiting for my brother to arrive. I've been a nervous wreck all week and I haven't had time to get into the lab to alleviate my nerves since the business side of my job has been overwhelming lately.

I am currently pacing the kitchen watching the casserole, I've prepared, cook in my oven. Jasper should be arriving any minute. Not even two seconds later I hear a light knock on my door. I quickly go and answer it. I open the door and look into my brother's green eyes, that looked almost grey in this lighting, and smiled. As soon as I let him in and shut the door, he wrapped me into a tight embrace. Jasper and I both have slim small figures, but I am significantly shorter than him. Granted I am shorter than everyone, standing at only five feet two inches.

"I've missed you Marleena." I give him my biggest smile. I hated being called by my first name now, but it didn't seem too bad when Jasper said it. It reminds me of him.

"I've missed you too. Why don't I give you a tour of the apartment while lunch finishes cooking?

After giving Jasper a tour of the apartment, he helps set the table, while I bring out my casserole. We sit down as the table and eat.

"This is really good Marleena." He emphasizes how good it is by making 'mm' noises during his next bite. A genuine laugh leaves my lips as I watch his ridiculous antics.

"Thank you." I say after I stop laughing. "So, tell me what your life's been like these past few years."

He gets a far away look in his eyes and his smile dims slightly. "Well, after you left the first-time father sent me away to a boarding school in Virginia."

This news surprised me; I knew that after what happened he would need a new school, but I never imagined father sending him away.

"After Tommy died and you left again, I was really angry. I felt like everyone in my life had left me. I've come to realize that I was just jealous of the fact that you were out following your dreams and I was too scared to do the same."

At this I just give him a small reassuring smile and let him continue.

"I finished out the rest of that year of school and then enlisted into the Navy. I was on a supplies ship, that delivered supplies to the ships after battles. I never saw combat only the aftermath"

I was shocked at hearing this. I never knew that my twin enlisted and risked his life in the war.

"One of the older men that I served with was Michael Dawson, who was more of a father to me than our own. After the war ended, he helped me get a job at the largest bank in Boston, that his family owned. I've worked hard and now I'm engaged to his daughter Millie and being groomed to eventually take over the bank." We are both smiling, the food long forgotten.

"I'm so proud of you Jasper and I definitely need to meet my future sister-in-law. Have you introduced her to mother?" I am thrilled to hear that he is living his fullest life despite our father, but I am also curious to hear if he has any contact with mother.

"I introduced her to mother and father. Mother loves her and father is just pleased that I am getting married." I just nod. "Mother misses you." I look away and nod as moisture begins to build up in my eyes. "She doesn't say it, but she does. But, she loves you too much to allow you to have any form of connection with father."

My head shoots up at this. "She told you this." He shakes his head. "She doesn't have too. I can see it. Besides she has tried to do the same for me, but father won't let her. For some reason he still wants me in his life." I just slowly nod my head as I stare at nothing

"I wish she would leave him." This statement pulls me back as I remember him saying something similar in several of his letters. I just nod and we clean up after lunch in silence.

After cleaning up our lunch we go into the sitting room and decide to play our favorite card game. After two full games filled with playful banter, I look up at my brother.

"I'm sorry for leaving you to deal with our family. It wasn't fair especially right after Tommy died."

He just looked at me and gave me a small smile. "I know why you did it and I forgive you. Besides I wasn't a very good brother to you and all you did was look out for yourself." He sighed. "I'm sorry I never stood up for you and was never there for you." He gave me a sad smile.

I reached over and grabbed his hand and squeezed. "All is forgiven Jasper. I'm just glad to have you back in my life."

He looked at me and smiled. "Me too sis."

I let go of his hand and placed the winning card down. "Ha! I just beat your ass!" The look of defeat brought on a fit of laughter that he quickly joined in on. After laughing until tears came to my eyes I looked over at my twin and was so happy to have him back in my life.