It takes two | Sirius Black

31.

Sirius is lay in bed, leaning against the headboard and holding Zion against his chest. Kate is sleeping besides him, his eyes flickering from her, the bump and then to Zion. He has his wand close by- just incase. He hadn't slept, for every time he closed his eyes Reg was there. A memory, a moment, or an imaginary conversation they should have had but never did.

His heart starts to ache again, he closes his eyes and pictures Reg in mind. He's already worrying about forgetting what he looks like, scared of the memory fading away. He blames himself for failing as a big brother. He could've saved him. He just didn't try hard enough.

His mind remembers the Potters, his heart leaping with guilt. Tears start to fall as he thinks of Reg finally being taken care of in the afterlife by people who actually have hearts. He was only 18. He had a whole life ahead of him, more shitty mistakes to make and Sirius would give anything for Reg to be here and do that. Even if it meant Reg being on that side. Even if it meant he never got Reg back. He just wanted him to be alive and safe. Have a future and happiness, true happiness.

Everyone was leaving. People were dying. It was too much. He stares at Kate, her hair stuck up in all directions as she fidgets in her sleep. She had spent all night tossing and turning, the baby making her uncomfortable.

"S'il te plait ne me quitte pas" Sirius whispers in a desperate pleading tone, "Tout le monde part."

"Sirius,baby I don't speak French." Kate replies half asleep, her eyes still shut as she stifles a loud yawn.

"It's nothing, don't worry about it." He smiles sadly looking down at Zion then to Kates ever growing bump.

The fear of losing even more people was too hard, too much for him to handle. If he lost Kate or Zion or their unborn baby or James or Pete or Remus, he would breakdown beyond repair for sure. These were the people keeping him going. These people were the only family he had left. The only true family he had ever had. The only consistent thing Sirius had was the three friends. His best friends. His brothers.

His thoughts are interrupted by slamming doors and footsteps. He places Zion down besides Kate and climbs out of bed, grabbing his wand. It doesn't feel like danger, then he scolds himself. Did the Potters realise they were in danger? Or had they trusted the person who murdered them? Had they let them walk into their home? Sirius shakes his head at the thought, his stomach churning. The death eaters had broken in, they'd broken in somehow.

He thinks of Reg. He can't help but wonder where the body is. Everyone deserves a real send off. He shudders at the thought of Reggie's body rotting someplace, all alone and hears a slam again.

He walks out into the corridor, running downstairs and sees James pacing. He's not slamming doors but kicking them and punching the walls, he has tears streaming down his face and Sirius doesn't know what to do. James had always been the strong one. James stops pacing, feeling Sirius watching him. He looks up at his best friend, sobbing even harder as Sirius rushes to his side. He holds him instinctively as James had done many times for.

"I want my Mum." James whimpers pathetically.

Sirius hugs him tighter and let's James cry. He can feel James shaking as he struggles to breathe, his own heart breaking. It doesn't take long for Sirius to start crying too. The loss in the house was felt every single day and now Reg was dead, they couldn't hide how much hurt they were feeling. It was blow after blow, and it felt as though it would never end.

"I wish she was here too."Sirius admits.

James looks up, "She's pregnant."

"What?"

"Lily." James says, guilt flashing in his eyes, "I didn't know.. I wish my Mum was here..because I think Lily hates me."

"Wow.."Sirius shakes his head, "She doesn't hate you. She's in love with you. "