Jules' Curse (#2)

Blizard

Today was going great, amazing even. Until me and jovian got stuck on the roads with the snow. Eventful. Now why are we even out during the bad weather storm? Well Valeria needed more pull-ups and Tabitha needed more pads and chocolate. She was upset Ansel left to go with Kia.

"You're breathing too fast loud." I huffed out rubbing my hands together. I may or may not be upset that he decided to go with me. If I would've went alone we wouldn't even be in this mess. Because I would've left early in the morning when the snow wasn't a bad.

"For the last time. Natural disasters happen,I told your ass not to go out." He glared my way.

"This is probably some stupid ploy to trap me to talk to you." I crossed my arms over my chest snuggling myself into my hoodie, thst isn't even thick. Look I'm used to the cold weather but in Puerto Rico it's hot as hell so I barely remember how it feels to be in cold weather.

"Oh trust me, if I wanted to talk to you. I would've already."

"So what you're implying is that you didn't want to talk to me? Fine by me." I turned toward the window staring as each snowflake fell on the window. We're currently parked in a abandoned church looking place. With nothing around it. We do have the choice to get out and walk to the store but the store is miles away.

So we're just waiting it out. I already told Tabitha and she said she'll be fine until it blows over and she'll watch Valeria. I was a bit anxious leaving Valeria with Tabitha alone while I'm not there.

"Why are you pissed?" He asked minutes later, read the room. We aren't friends and we aren't dating we are just two people sitting in a car. Whatever happened last night I was drunk.

"I'm not pissed." I frowned.

"Aren't you tired of this repeated cycle of us? We're friends, then we're dating, then we break up, then we flirt, we kiss, and it all repeats." I wouldn't call it a cycle, more so the circle of life, well for me.

"I already told you, getting involved with me is going to lead to this but you insisted on all of this. So don't say I didn't warn you, because I remember giving you multiple warning signs. Like the fact I have five different medication to take, and if I don't take them I'll go off the rails not enough of a warning sign then I have no idea what is." I looked around before getting out of the car.

Being in the car with him makes me want to rip off my own skin. It's just so frustrating right now.

"Jules, what are you doing?" Jovian asked as he got out of the car too. I heard as the ice crushed behind me letting me know he was following me.

"I would rather get frostbite than have another conversation with you." I kept walking towards the store. It was miles down, maybe if I ran this would be better. The snow came up to under my knee.

"You're being ridiculous. "

I ignored him as I kept walking. He caught up to me grabbing me by my arm. "Im fucking freezing and you're acting, impossible. Just tell me what you want, straight up." I can't have what I want because I'm mentally fucked up. Why can't he get that?

I want heat, I want food, possibly some sleep. And to snuggle with Pluto oh and Valeria.

"Be more specific." All of a sudden I didn't feel as cold as he stepped closer to me.

"Me, us. What do you want?" Hell I want a lot of things that I know are bad for me. I need to go in that Church and cleanse myself for wanting him. Literally a full on cleanse.

Don't do it, you've made progress on your mental health. Don't back track now .

But he doesn't affect me in a bad way mentally he actually affects me in a good way. It's actually disturbing that the thought of going back to archers Ville with him crossed my mind. It was a stupid drunken thought.

But let's be real I can't blame everything on the alcohol....

"I'm going back home tomorrow, it doesn't matter what I say or do right now." I tried to snatch my arm back but he didn't bulge.

"It does, everything you say or do matters to me."

"Well to save us both the heartache can we just stop
this? We can see other people or do whatever." I felt his hand travel from my arm to my hand. His cold hand linked with mine. I stared at our hands as I felt a warmth rub through me.

I slowly let go of his hand waiting for him to let go. He let go a little after. I turned and walked back to the car. I got in the car and moved to the backseat so I can lay out comfortably. Walking was definitely a bad idea. I'm just so confused on what to do. I mean I never just told him the story of my life. I don't want him to pity me though.

When he got back in the car it was silent, I've realized he doesn't question a lot about me, like my past. "Do you know why I thought Matt was the father?"

"Nah, you never really got into details. And I never asked because I knew it was a sensitive topic."

"Right. Well.. me having sex with Matt wasn't always consensual, along with some other guys. And i hated myself for these things happening. I always thought it was something I did, or maybe I gave off a wrong impression. But I wasn't the problem, it was the men. In every relationship I've been in with men, was disappointing and hurtful. So after a while I felt that I was incapable of love, and I even believed it. Then I started to think that love was a evil thing that was meant to hurt. That it was always suppose to hurt. So I got afraid. Really scarred because I didn't want to get hurt again. So I push myself away when things get more serious or when I start to get to comfortable in a relationship."

Tears filled my eyes. Jovian stayed quiet, really quiet. I started to get a little scarred by his silence. Then I heard him get out of the car. Jeez I knew it was a lot to take in but I knew he kinda knew. When I saw the back door open. I stared at him confused as he squeezed his way in without interfering with the way I was laying down. He brought me into his arms. This made me feel better about alot. It made me feel more secure within the moments.

"Jules. I can't promise you alot, but I can promise you I'll never hurt you in purposely or in anyway, and I understand. I understand why it's hard for you to trust me." My eyes closed a bit relieved. He kissed my forehead making my stomach explode with butterfly's.

The rest of the time we laid here together. I told him about some things I experienced in the system. And about Valentines and Diego and how it's crazy they ended up together.  Then he told me some things about how Ellie is going through another identity crisis and how his mom got an promotion. Then he let me in on some more stuff about his child hood. I even found out he had dyslexia. But I never realized or knew.

He said he had a pretty good tutor growing up so it wasn't as bad. There's still some things here and there that's hard for him. But then he told me how he thought about wearing contacts more instead of glasses and I instantly objected. Glasses just fit him more. Plus they're cute on him.

We continued to talk until I got sleepy and eventually fell asleep.

When I woke up I was back at the cabin. And our flight was in an hour....

A/n

Does anyone like snow?