[BL] The Darling Villain

Chapter 81. I am Going to Kill Her

Author's Note:
Feel free to skip this small segment of my thoughts ^-^ but of course, it would be greatly appreciated if you were to stay and read this. If nobody were to read this, then that would be sad lol. First of all, I want to apologize for the late update. The last time I took such a long hiatus, I stopped writing for approximately ten days. This time, it's twelve days.

Every time I thought about writing a "new chapter", my body instantly rejected it lmao. If you are an avid online Wattpad writer like myself, then you would have experienced the pain of Writer's Block.

This is when writing or updating a new chapter feels like a chore to accomplish—not for your own fun—but rather for those reading it. It is an emotionally draining motivation.

I had felt emotionally drained, and was also busy with other projects at school. But naturally, there were a few times where I felt the yearning to quit and stop everything. This is weird for me, since I do have a big ego (if you didn't know, then you know now 😅). I remember uploading 50 chapters with 2,000 words each chapter on my old account purely for myself, despite nobody reading it. This is an example of my pride.

Perhaps my ego felt hurt after reading some discouraging messages.

Here is a reminder for everyone: ❗️STOP READING IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT ❗️

When I wrote fan-fictions in the past, there was no problem with this. Now that I'm writing an original story (which I've always yearned to do), readers have issues with what I've created, despite it having similar (and if not the same) quality as my fan-fictions. I've read stuff like "too rush", or "I might not be able to continue reading", or "I'm dropping this shit".

I am a little sensitive bitch that cannot handle "feedback". Okay, I can handle with "I cannot keep up with your book. Maybe try doing this instead", which I would appreciate a lot. However, I do not want to know whether you're dropping my book or not. I do not have any interest in knowing either. It only makes me feel like a worthless little shit that has no value in this god forsaken world ❤️

Especially when those comments are written at early chapters (like 8 and 9, which people had a lot of problems with due to age gaps)... you're hurting my pride!

If you have a problem with this book, spare me your negative comments and instead tell me how to improve! I once had a fellow reader who did that, which I appreciate 🥺

I am a pretty invisible person irl, so Wattpad and writing is the only way for me to stand out. If I cannot even call myself "decent enough" at what I'm doing, then all my years of emotional torment have been for naught. We can learn together. You can teach me, I can teach you. Let's improve together! 🤝

*****

It has been fifteen years since the birth of Lucilline Rubius.

Outside in a garden flourishing of flowers, tiny birds rested on high branches.

They chirruped harmoniously, with their singing suffused in the morning's warm atmosphere. Their small feathers shuffled back and forth, bathing in the sunlight's rays. Showing off their affectionate and benevolent voices, the birds were all attempting to pique the interest of a "certain someone".

Unfortunately, that "certain someone" only treated them as background noise.

"Young Master, would you like to see today's schedule?" A plain white door swung open, and out came Willow. She held a slip of paper in her hands.

Her pair of brilliant purple eyes stared brightly, reflecting glimmers of amethyst within her pupils. They focused on the young teenage boy standing in front of the balcony. Lucilline slumped his entire body over the balcony's fence, his own golden eyes appreciating the garden of what his mother had left. In the spur of the moment, he finally snapped out from his trance.