One and only warning: This book contains religion, catholic guilt, sex addiction, drug abuse, graphic sexual content and heavy violence. Read at your own discretion.
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"I am a priest, Anna. A child of god. You are a temptation," He whispered out, h...
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"Do you want eggs on your bagel?" Harry called from the kitchen as I laid wrapped up in the blankets on the couch, with, you guessed it, a cup of coffee. Shocker?
After last night, me and Harry had a long talk. We stayed up until almost two o'clock in the morning talking about everything. I told him about how lonely I'd been since he had been away, how badly I missed him. He told me he felt the same way, that he hated being away from me all day, that we were going to work on things and hopefully things would improve.
So, he said he would stay home more often, try to find time for us.
I'm trying to work past what happened. Not like I could give myself much to process it, it had only been less than twenty-four hours. I didn't wake up with the same fluttery feeling like I usually did, but instead woke up sort of mute and numb. I didn't want this to ruin our relationship, I knew that we were going to have hardships ahead of us, so I tried my best to act like I was okay.
I was a professional at that.
Pretending to just be okay.
"Yes, baby, please!" I called back to him, "With cheese on top as well."
"And hashbrowns?"
"No, just the bagel is fine."
In all honesty, today was going to be nerve-wrecking for me. My stomach was already hurting and my anxiety had been through the roof. Today was my first day of therapy. Funny timing, isn't it? First thing I wanted to say to my new therapist was that my boyfriend managed to kill a cop last night and I really needed to get over the fact that I saw two dead bodies and now my chest hurts because I can't control my anxiety.
And, to top it off, my first therapy appointment had to be in person. When I scheduled this appointment, I told them I only wanted to do it over zoom, or whatever keeps me at home, but they fucked up and now I had to actually go in office.
Which was quite aways from Madrid, but not too bad of a drive, I guessed.
Anything to make progress, right?
I had been looking forward to this for a month now. I was ready to get it all out, ready to start working through my fucking shit, and ready to be diagnosed with whatever the hell keeps making me have these horrid nightmares.
Harry knew today was a big step for me. He was so supportive, he even woke up earlier to make me coffee and breakfast. He said that he didn't want me to stress today, that it was our day together since he took the day off. I asked about his mom, and he said he called up there to tell them he wouldn't be there this morning.
His mom had been getting slightly better, too. I hadn't gone there to meet her given that Harry never asked and every time that I offered to come with, he would say no, that I should stay and sleep in or whatever. But he did tell me that she's made it through the worst of the withdrawals, which I would've thought since it'd been some months.
