Leah and her soldier

The struggle

~Leah's POV~
It's been a month since that horrible day and this is my first day back at training. I really don't want to be here right now. The colony has been repaired and repainted I guess it's arsenals way of trying to help up forget what happened but I will never forget. I still get nightmares seeing Chris' lifeless body being carried out, me screaming my lungs out crying out for her. Katie and Beth holding me back stopping me from going to her. Going to the person I love the most in this world. As I pull up to the colony I take a deep breath before getting out of the car. I get my boots out of the back of the car and head inside with the best fake smile I can manage "SHE'S BACK!!" Beth and Katie run over to me and Lia follows behind. I try to match their enthusiasm but I can't seem to do it. Lia gives me a hug "how are you doing Leah?" I lie "good yeah glad to be back" "really you don't sound that convincing?" "Well it was only a month ago when people were shooting up this place to get to me and Kim so yeah a little skeptical about it all" "I get that but they are gone now" "yeah and at what cost?" "I know are you staying to train?" "I didn't dress like this for no reason." I go into the changing rooms where I'm hugged by everyone but there is only one hug I want right now. Once I'm dressed I go into the gym and I freeze the last time I was in here we were hiding. I feel a hand on my shoulder and flinch "it's ok Leah it's just me" "oh hey Kim" "don't worry we all freaked on our first day back but we will get you through it Leah I promise." I take a deep breath and start my training mainly keeping to myself getting lost in my thoughts. Before I know it the session is over "can we come see her?" "Hm what sorry Steph I was in a world of my own what did you say?" "I said can we pop and see her?" "Only a couple she's still not doing too good at the moment" "ok thank you." I get changed then head back to my car and for the first time today I feel safe. I start the car up and start driving home this is when the smile appears on my face, home where my girlfriend is.

Did I mention I have a new girlfriend? She is unbelievable so me driving home to her is putting the biggest smile on my face. I arrive home "hi baby I'm home" there is no answer so I go into the bedroom and there she is fast asleep. I sit on the edge of the bed and kiss her head and she wakes up "oh hi baby sorry I fell asleep" "hey you deserve to sleep you need to sleep" "you know Leah I've never told you this and it's mainly because of that fact that I'm a scaredy cat. But not now, I love you Leah and I have from that first kiss" "I love you too Chris you know I love you more than anything." Chris my Chris love of my life. She got out of hospital a week ago let me start from the beginning.

~Flashback~
We are hid against the back wall I'm shaking so bad we are trying our hardest not to make any noise we are all crying. Then we hear it "all clear" poff leads us towards the door and out of the then I hear "MAN DOWN! MAN DOWN!" My heart drops then I hear the worst thing I could hear "boss it's Chris" no, no it's not there lying "Leah we need to go" "no Chris!" Katie and Beth grab me as I try to run to her "GET OFF ME!! CHRIS! CHRIS!! GET OFF ME NOW!!" They keep pulling me away I'm hysterical I see her get put on a stretcher and rushed out of the building I'm trying to follow her but I'm still being held back I fall to the floor crying into my hands. "Leah we have to get to the apartment they want to clear the rest of the building" "they should of let me go Kim" I stand up and shout at Katie and Beth "WHY DID YOU NOT LET ME GO?!" "Leah.." "just leave me alone." We head up to the apartment and I go straight to Chris' bedroom where I spend the next 3 days refusing to leave, refusing to eat and refusing to speak to anyone. Poff tried to claim Chris' room but I would not let him and made him sleep on the sofa. Georgie has been keeping me up to date with Chris' progress which apparently isn't much. She has had surgery to try and repair her knee she said it was shattered by a bullet and she has had a bullet removed from her chest just above her right breast and right arm. She is in a stable but critical condition I keep getting told but I'm not allowed to see her. Not until they know it is safe we aren't allowed to leave the apartment which is fine by me because I don't want to see anyone. After 3 days we were told it was over and we can go home. I've never ran so fast I ran straight out of the apartment got in my car and drove to the hospital. As soon as I get there I run to the ward and into her room. I take her hand and kiss her head "hi baby I'm here now I would love it if you could wake up for me. Chris I love you so much and I need you so when you're ready just open them beautiful eyes." I sit next to her bed and keep hold of her hand "I don't actually know if you can hear me but Poff tried to claim your room again but don't worry I didn't let him. Instead I claimed your room. I wore so many of your clothes to be close to you..." "Leah?" I turn around "mum? What you doing here?" "The girls told me you would be here. How are you doing? I'm so glad to see you unharmed" "that's because of this woman here she saved us. She saved me, I love her mum" I start crying and my mum comes and puts her arm around me "she has been through a lot Leah give her a chance. She is strong and you didn't notice but I did" "notice what?" "The way she looked at you when she brought you home that night the way she smiled at your laugh and smile" "no I never noticed" "everyone that night noticed but you." My mum stays for a while before going home. The nurse tells me I have to go but I refuse to leave Chris' side after lengthy discussion and some help from Georgie they let me stay. I spend the next 2 days holding Chris' hand I keep talking to her hoping she will wake up and answer me. I lean over and whisper in her ear "I want you to be mine, I want you to be my girlfriend." I thought I was mishearing but no it was muffled and weak but the voice said "I would love too" I look and see chris' eyes open. "Chris you're awake" she takes her oxygen mask off "did you mean what you said?" "Of course I did I love you I want to call you my girlfriend" "best thing to ever wake up too" she goes to sit up "ahhh" "careful baby what do you need?" "A kiss from my girlfriend" "hmmm just a small one then get that oxygen mask back on" "ok." I give her lots of small kisses pulling her oxygen mask back up "how are you feeling?" "Sore. How you been since it happened?" "I never left your room" she takes my hand and just holds it "baby I need to let the doctors know you're awake."

Chris spends 2 weeks in the hospital I try to spend as much time as I can there but she keeps sending me home. Soooo instead me and Emily make Chris' new flat a home. And that's where we are now I refuse to leave and spend every night here but now Chris made me go to training today but now I'm home and lying with my head on Chris' chest but the left side it's taken some getting used to. "What's on your mind baby?" "I'm just happy to be back here with you" "how did training go?" "I hated it and I freaked out a little if I'm honest" "this may sound horrible but I'm glad you did because it means your not in denial" "how can I be in denial when my girlfriend took 3 bullets for us and ended her career how do you feel about becoming a trainer?" "It's going to be strange not going to lie but I will make good soldiers or kick their arse." "I forgot to tell you some of the girls are coming around to see you" "Leah they shouldn't see me like this, you shouldn't see me like this" "baby I'm going nowhere and the girls miss you could you not tell by all the flowers?" "Fine ok I cave you get your way again" "and this is one of the many reasons I love you" "mhmmm and I love you now what time are they coming for?" "The next 5 minutes" "what? I need to get sorted" "baby you're staying in bed" "but.." "no buts" "fine but just know I'm doing this under protest" "I accept that now can I get you anything?" "Actually you know I hate asking but I need the toilet" "ok give me a second I will get your wheelchair over" "thank you." I help Chris into the wheelchair and when she is using the toilet the girls arrive I tell them to wait in the bedroom then go back to helping Chris. I bring her back into the bedroom "hey hero how you doing?" "Been better but yeah not too bad thanks Viv how are you girls doing?" "All good thanks to you" "why you being so quiet Katie?" "I just don't want to overwhelm you that's all" "first time for everything. What about yous 3 Beth, Steph yous keeping alright? Kim the team behaving?" I can see the girls acting quiet I can feel the tense energy I can see Chris trying so I decide to step in "what is going on with you lot? Just have a conversation with her Jesus." "Leah it's fine honestly they just don't know how to react i don't blame yous. Yous don't have to stay you can go if you want" "no we want to stay I promise we do we are just awkward" "well it's nice to see yous anyways" "how long are you look for recovery?" "Not a clue apparently I have one hell of a ride to get through with physio" "you'll do it baby I know you will" "I know I'm just not looking forward to it" "I know.. oh my mum is on her way up she has just parked up" "awesome" Chris pulls the cards and her iPad out of the draw. I love the bond the pair of them have built my mum came to visit Chris quite often and now they play scrabble on the iPad and cards on every visit. They tried scrabble with the board but Chris kept getting frustrated with the letters falling off so they found a scrabble app. I love excited Chris gets when she hears my mum is coming, you see my mum is the only one so far that treats her like she isn't some glass bauble that can break with the slightest gust of wind. Even when the guys from the platoon came it was like walking on egg shells, yes my mum is careful in fact very careful but she doesn't make it obvious and they get on like a house on fire which makes me very happy. My mum is my best friend and if she didn't approve of Chris god knows what would have happened "helllooo" "hi mum" "hey Amanda" "hi sweetheart hey girls yous alright?" "Yeah good thanks Amanda" "good so Chris what we playing first?" "Scrabble it's your turn and I think the game is close to finishing" "okie doke." My mum and Chris play for a couple of hours whilst I talk with the girls. Everyone then leaves and Chris falls asleep but I have to wake her for tea. After we eat we decide to have a movie night but we both fall asleep early.