Stumbling through the dark

Just A Sound At Twilight.

Niall stared up at the white ceiling. He was so sick and tired of being sick and tired. He always hated hospitals and going to doctors and now he was stuck with them. "OK, Niall" The doctor pulled his stethoscope out of his ears and smiled at his patient " the nurse is going to set up a breathing treatment for you and also an IV for fluids. You're very dehydrated and we also need to get that asthma under control so you don't have a major attack. And you do need to eat something. Niall " the doctor gave him a serious look "you need to start taking proper care of yourself. We can control the MS to a degree but if you don't work with us in trying to maintain your health, you'll be seeing far more of this place than you'd prefer" He patted Niall's shoulder and left the room. Niall turned his gaze back to the ceiling.

"There you go , love" The nurse fitted the mask over his face and turned on the nebuliser before fitting the canula into the back of his hand, attaching the IV drip and turning it on. "You rest while this works and I'll be back when it's done. " And she was gone, leaving Niall  alone with his thoughts.

Why Zayn, why did you do it, he thought to himself. Zayn had deliberately destroyed himself. The media would be having a field day with Zayn's revelation. And to do it on Nationwide TV. That was suicide. Niall groaned to himself. Well that was an unfortunate phrase to use, even in his thoughts. It was suicide that had started this disaster. My fault, he knew it. If he hadn't been so stupid, so selfish, Zayn would never have done this. And it still didn't explain why Zayn had done it. What ever had possessed him to do it. Niall rubbed his forehead with his free hand. His head ached badly.He closed his eyes and the hum of the nebuliser lulled him into sleep. When he woke up the mask was gone though the IV was still in place, it's fluid slowly dripping down into his body.

"Knock,knock" Harry poked his head around the door. "OK to come in?"

"Yeah, come save me from myself" Niall sounded depressed

"What's up, Ni? Feeling bad?" Harry drew up a chair and positioned it so he was facing the bed.

"Na, not bad like that. I'm just worried sick about Zayn. Why did he do this? He knew I didn't want him to do it. I told him. You guys left him voice messages telling him no. He avoided us all. Now look at the mess. It's worse. Why didn't he give us a chance to bluff our way out? There's no way now that we have that chance. We can't even claim he was misquoted! National TV!" Niall wailed, his voice rising as he spoke. Management will go mad. Zayn isn't supposed to have any contact with us."

"Is everything all right in here?" a nurse suddenly appeared. She bustled about Niall checking his blood pressure , temperature, breathing  and so forth before turning to Harry. " I think it would be best if you left now so Mr Horan can get some rest. He's in need of another breathing treatment and he mustn't get so agitated. It isn't good for him" She glared at Harry as if Niall's outburst had been caused by Harry himself.

"No, please. I want him to stay" Niall pleaded with her but she shook her head firmly. Harry stood up and gave Niall a quick hug  before telling him he'd return in the morning and maybe he, Harry, would have had some answers  for Niall by then. Niall desperately wanted him to stay but it was obvious the nurse was not going to allow it. He sank back against his pillows and allowed her to fix the mask over his face once more then turn the nebuliser back on before continuing to fuss around him. Niall hoped she'd finish soon and leave him alone. Finally the nebuliser had finished it's work and after seeing to Niall's needs, she left only to return  with a tray of food , which she put on the side table and swung it over the bed. Niall looked at the food and shuddered before pushing it away. Just looking at it made him feel sick. The nurse tutted as she removed it but Niall was grateful she didn't force the issue.Eventually the nurse made sure Niall was warmly covered before dimming the lights and leaving him to sleep.

Niall was  only vaguely aware of  a nurse coming and going during the night. He barely stirred as she checked his IV and did her  routine observations. He was exhausted, far more than would be normal and he supposed it was due to the  ongoing side effects of his medications. He'd be so glad when they finally wore off as he had been assured they would. He wasn't really asleep but he wasn't really awake. either. He just was too worn out to pay attention  It was almost like being mildly sedated, a twilight sleep. He heard the door of his room open and someone come in. He waited for the nurse to begin her checks but thought he  must have fallen asleep for real at some point  as he didn't register her moving around him. He then  felt a gentle, cool hand brush across his forehead and move his hair back into it's usual style. There was a creaking sound as someone sat down on the chair  beside the bed before an unidentified sound started. Niall's forehead creased in thought as he tried to identify the noise. It sounded like a pen scratching across paper. He tried to prise his eyes open to see but they wouldn't obey him, his eyelids felt like ton weights . He turned his head slightly towards to sound but it stopped abruptly.Niall drifted back into his twilight sleep and the scratching sound resumed once more. Niall slipped further and further into sleep and when he next woke up, the sun was streaming through the window .