Stumbling through the dark

"Aoife!"

"It's a mix of bad and good news , Niall. " James put down the folder but retained hold of the scan pictures. "Look, as you can see, compering your last scan with the one taken today, the lesions have increased" James indicated the different spots on each scan. Niall's face grew pale. This is what he had been dreading. He knew things were getting worse but somehow he wanted to be in denial .Too late now. He studied the scans himself, his face expressionless.

"And this means?" Liam decided to ask seeing as Niall hadn't spoken.

"It's progressed and Niall's medication is no longer effective" James answered "However....." he paused and waited until both men were focussed on him " that's the bad news"

"And you said it was a mix of that and good news" Liam prompted seeing Niall's withdrawn expression.

"The good news is that we have had great advances in drug therapy since Niall was put on this medication. And for some reason, it appears more effective in those patients that have had the stem cell treatment. It is experimental to some degree though, and may have risks. Look, I have to go now but will you be willing to discuss this with me later this week? I've already spoken to your doctor, Niall, and she'll need at attend as well. Shall I have my secretary set up an appointment?" .

"Yeah... I think you should do that" Liam said immediately "Nialler, you up for that?

"I guess so" Niall whispered " I mean..there's not much choice really, is there?"

"Niall, your MS will progress if we don't do anything." James replied "but the choice will always be yours"

"I'll come....can I bring my daughter?...and Liam?' Niall asked hesitantly.

"Please do." James rose and shook hands with both men " I'll get it arranged, then. Niall, you are free to leave after the nurse has done her 'obs' and I'll see you soon." James left then and the nurse came bustling back in .

"You're quiet, Niall" Jacey remarked as she sat next to him on the couch."Tired?"

"Mmmh..a bit. Thinking, too" Niall closed his yes and leant his head back.

"Want to talk?" Jacey threaded her hands through his blond hair, massaging his scalp gently.

"Nah, rather cuddle" Niall pulled her into his arms and snuggled his head into her neck, making her giggle. Niall gently started to bite her neck then moved his head so he was kissing her lips softly. The kisses got distinctly warmer and they broke apart, both breathing heavily.

"Errhhh...mmmm..ah" Niall was crimson with embarrassment.

"Niall?......"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up!"Jacey pulled him back in and started kissing him again, her hands roaming up and down his back then sneaking under the tight T Shirt he was wearing, her cold hands making him shudder slightly. They were soon lost in their own little world.

The week passed quickly and Niall, accompanied by Liam, Jacey and Aoife, returned to the hospital to meet up with Niall's Specialist. To say Niall was apprehensive was an understatement. He was desperate to be able to halt the MS from progressing but nervous that he might not be able to have the latest treatment. James Caldwell did say it was experimental and wasn't without risk. Still, it wouldn't hurt to talk about it. He fidgeted nervously as they sat in the comfortable waiting room waiting for the Specialist to see them.

"Niall....how are you?" James asked as he waved his hand at the chairs that were grouped together in frount of his desk. "Liam and Jacey I do know, so you must be Aoife" James extended his hand to shake Aoife's as he smiled brightly at her. "Now, I am sure you are anxious to hear about this new treatment so I'll get straight into it".

The journey home was quiet. Everyone felt their heads were buzzing with all the information James had given to them pertaining to the possible treatment. It had risks and it certainly wasn't just a question of swallowing a few pills.It was a slightly scaled down version of the Stem Cell Transplant that Niall had been though before, combined with weekly IV infusions.Most people did well with it but a very small percentage of unfortunate patients , developed dangerous, life threatening side effects. And there was no way in knowing before hand, who would be one of the unfortunate ones.

"I don't know, Da" Aoife was worried "it sounds pretty risky to me. Are you sure you want to try it?". She had listened intently to everything James Caldwell had said about the new treatment but the possible side effects sounded dreadful. She wasn't sure it was worth the risk.

"I certainly want to think about it but I'm not rushing into it pumpkin, so don't panic" Niall said soothingly. He planned to talk it over with Jacey when they were alone so she could explain all the technical side of things that Niall was unsure of, but at the moment, Niall was more worried that Aoife was getting stressed out and he didn't want her upset, especially so far into her pregnancy. " No fretting, OK?". Aoife half smiled at him and nodded but she still didn't look happy.

"Da, I'm tired so I'm going to bed" Aoife rubbed her baby bump soothing her restless baby who was intent on playing football" . She kissed Niall then headed upstairs to her old bedroom.Taylor and Liam and gone straight to the airport after the hospital appointment as they had commitments in the USA with a new band Liam was working with and she hadn't wanted to be home alone. It had been a long day and she was both exhausted and stressed though she tried valiantly to hide it from her dad. She smiled to herself when she thought just how shy her dad still was about her pregnancy.Sometimes she wondered to herself how he'd ever managed to make a baby with her ma.Her smile faded. Her Da, Taylor and Liam were wonderful but she missed not having a mother, especially now.

Aoife groaned in pain. Her stomach was cramping badly and she felt sick. She stumbled to the bathroom adjoining her bedroom and slowly and clumsily got to her knees in front of the toilet. Her tummy pitched and she was sick. Must have been something she ate, she thought vaguely but couldn't think what. Feeling better she hauled herself to her feet, slipping slightly then a terrible pain tore through her belly/ The pain muted but she then felt a gushing sensation. Looking down she saw her nightdress was soaked. Her waters must have broken but it was  too soon.The baby wasn't due yet.

"Da. Da" Aoife screamed. She could hear footsteps racing down the hallway then she blacked out, vaguely aware of being caught as she fell.

"Aoife!"